Coaching practices for I'm Standing at a Choice Where I Can Feel Myself About to Take the Easy Lesser Road and Abstract Principles Aren't Holding Me but If I Picture a Particular Person I Deeply Admire Watching Me Decide This I Suddenly Know Exactly Which Way is the One I'd Be Proud of
Describe almost anything you are working through and IX Coach finds the practices whose real-world fit is closest. For I'm Standing at a Choice Where I Can Feel Myself About to Take the Easy Lesser Road and Abstract Principles Aren't Holding Me but If I Picture a Particular Person I Deeply Admire Watching Me Decide This I Suddenly Know Exactly Which Way is the One I'd Be Proud of, these are the strongest matches in the current practice library.
Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?
- I’m standing at a choice where I can feel myself about to take the easy, lesser road, and abstract principles aren’t holding me
- Stuck at a hard choice, "can I even do this?" just loops in my head and freezes me
- I keep making the choice that the version of me a year from now would groan at
- There’s a decision I keep half-defending with a fog of "well, the circumstances, the other people, what else could I have done"
- When demands pull me in different directions I just bend toward whichever voice is loudest, because I’ve never actually pinned down my own criteria
Practices that may help
- Act as if sages were watching — the practice of the philosophical community
Before any action, ask: would a person I genuinely respect — who embodies the values I aspire to — approve of this?
Pierre Hadot’s Spiritual Exercises - Borrow an identity temporarily by asking "what would [person] do?"
Temporarily adopting a role model’s identity in a specific context lowers the friction of acting as they would.
Identity Priming, Made Practical - Consult your future self
Imagine your wiser future self looking back on this moment, and ask what they’d want you to do.
Self-Distancing: Thinking Clearly About Your Own Problems - Take radical responsibility for your choices
Own every choice completely — including its unintended consequences and the unchosen conditions within which you chose.
Existentialism and Radical Choice - Write your own internal standard
Articulate the values and criteria you’ll use to judge your own choices, independent of approval.
Self-Authorship: Moving From the Socialized to the Self-Authored Mind - Filter decisions through "what would future me thank me for?"
Before significant decisions, ask whether your future self will be grateful or resentful.
Future Self Continuity, Made Practical - Use precommitment devices to bind your present self to your future self’s preferences
Commit future behavior before the moment of temptation, because your present self is the weak link.
Future Self Continuity, Made Practical - Decide whether you’re optimizing for experience or for memory
For major choices, explicitly ask: "Am I choosing for who will live this — or for who will remember it?"
The Peak-End Rule — How Memory Distorts Experience - Name the values the regret is about
Regret points at a violated value — make the value explicit.
The Regret-Minimization Framework - Advise yourself as you would a friend
Ask what you would tell a friend in exactly your situation — then take your own advice.
Self-Distancing: Thinking Clearly About Your Own Problems
Related concerns
- What Would My Best Self Do
Imagine your wiser future self looking back on this moment, and ask what they’d want you to do.
Consult your future self
- When Sympatheia The Common Good Standard
Ask whether what you’re about to do serves or damages the common good — not just your interests.
Test your actions against the common good
- Appreciate What You Chose
Counter maximizer regret by actively appreciating the option you took.
Practice gratitude for what you chose
- Behavioral Bridge Possible Selves
Identify one specific behavior your hoped-for self does that you can do today — then do it.
Build a behavioral bridge to the possible self
- Future Self Continuity On A Budget
Hal Hershfield’s research shows that most people experience their future self as a stranger — neurologically similar to perceiving another person rather than themselves. This psychological distance explains impulsive decisions that trade future wellbeing for present comfort. Practices that increase felt connection to the future self reduce this discounting and improve decisions ranging from saving to health behavior.
- Future Self Continuity When Overwhelmed
Hal Hershfield’s research shows that most people experience their future self as a stranger — neurologically similar to perceiving another person rather than themselves. This psychological distance explains impulsive decisions that trade future wellbeing for present comfort. Practices that increase felt connection to the future self reduce this discounting and improve decisions ranging from saving to health behavior.
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