Coaching practices for Chair Work Compassion Focused Therapy

Describe almost anything you are working through and IX Coach finds the practices whose real-world fit is closest. For Chair Work Compassion Focused Therapy, these are the strongest matches in the current practice library.

Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?

  • When everything’s falling apart I have nobody in my head to turn to
  • Every time I try to be gentle with myself my body’s still wound tight and braced, and the calming part just won’t take
  • One part of me wants out, another part won’t let me, and they just war with each other on a loop
  • When the scared or self-loathing part of me shows up, my reflex is to shove it away or pile more judgment on it, which only makes it worse
  • A hard moment just hit and I can feel the spiral starting

Practices that may help

  1. Compassion-Focused Therapy: Calming the Inner Critic
    Compassion-Focused Therapy (CFT), developed by Paul Gilbert, targets shame and self-criticism by training a compassionate inner voice to replace the punitive self-critic. It draws on evolutionary psychology and affective neuroscience — specifically, the finding that different emotional systems (threat, drive, soothing) have distinct neurobiological profiles. A growing body of RCT evidence supports CFT for shame-based difficulties, self-criticism, and depression, though the evidence base is smaller than for CBT.
  2. Compassionate Imagery: The Compassionate Image and Safe Place
    Develop a vivid compassionate figure in imagination whose care you can access during distress.
    Compassion-Focused Therapy: Calming the Inner Critic
  3. Soothing Rhythm Breathing
    Use slow, rhythmic breathing to deliberately activate the physiological soothing system before other compassion practices.
    Compassion-Focused Therapy: Calming the Inner Critic
  4. Working with Multiple Selves (Chair Work in CFT)
    Give voice to different internal parts — the critic, the anxious self, the compassionate self — to understand and change the dialogue.
    Compassion-Focused Therapy: Calming the Inner Critic
  5. Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), Made Practical
    ACT teaches you to stop fighting difficult thoughts and feelings and instead take committed action toward what you value, even while they are present. Its core processes — defusion, acceptance, contact with values, and committed action — have a substantial and growing base of randomized-trial support across many conditions.
  6. Cultivate Self through directed inner compassion
    Practice sending compassion inward — toward the parts that are suffering — to build the Self-energy those parts need.
    IFS Self Energy, Made Practical
  7. The self-compassion break
    A three-step phrase you say in a hard moment: this is suffering, suffering is human, may I be kind to myself.
    Self-Compassion, Made Practical
  8. Compassionate Letter Writing
    Write a letter to yourself from the perspective of a wise, compassionate friend — about something you’ve been judging yourself for.
    Compassion-Focused Therapy: Calming the Inner Critic
  9. Practice tonglen for your own suffering first
    Use your own current pain as the object before extending the practice to others.
    Tonglen: The Tibetan Practice of Taking and Sending
  10. Developing the Compassionate Self Voice
    Build an inner voice that responds to your suffering with wisdom, warmth, and commitment to wellbeing.
    Compassion-Focused Therapy: Calming the Inner Critic

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