Coaching practices for Deliberate Practice Not Just Practice for My Teenager

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Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?

• I sit down to practice for an hour but I’m half on my phone the whole time
• When I practice I’m just kind of doing it again and hoping it’s better, because I don’t actually have a clear picture in my head of what great is supposed to look like
• I’ve been putting in the hours for ages and I’ve completely plateaued
• There’s one specific part of this that keeps tripping me up, but I always practice the whole thing start to finish
• We keep having the exact same blow-up over the exact same thing, and I’m starting to wonder if my kid genuinely doesn’t know how to handle that moment any other way

Practices that may help

1. Deliberate Practice, Not Just Practice
   Deliberate practice, studied by Anders Ericsson, is focused, effortful practice aimed just beyond your current ability, with immediate feedback and constant correction. It is what separates people who keep improving from people who simply log hours — and it is why the popular "10,000 hours" rule is an oversimplification of his work.
2. Practice with full, undivided focus
   Short blocks of complete concentration beat long blocks of distracted repetition.
   Deliberate Practice, Not Just Practice
3. Build sharper mental representations
   Develop a detailed internal model of what excellent performance looks like.
   Deliberate Practice, Not Just Practice
4. Practice deliberately, not just repeatedly
   Target weaknesses with full focus and feedback, not comfortable repetition.
   Grit: Passion and Perseverance, Honestly Assessed
5. Break the skill into components and drill the weak link
   Isolate the specific sub-skill that limits you and train it on its own.
   Deliberate Practice, Not Just Practice
6. Take time for training — teach the skill, not just the rule
   Children misbehave partly because they don’t know how to do the right thing — teach the skill when everyone is calm.
   Positive Discipline (Jane Nelsen)
7. Train at the edge of your ability
   Work on tasks just beyond what you can reliably do, not what you already do well.
   Deliberate Practice, Not Just Practice
8. Sustain effortful practice over the long haul
   Make deliberate practice repeatable across years, not heroic for a week.
   Deliberate Practice, Not Just Practice
9. Give performers choice within practice to support autonomy
   Offer self-directed options in practice — which drill, how many reps, which cue — to enhance intrinsic motivation and learning.
   External Focus of Attention, Made Practical
10. Coached practice with targeted feedback
    Attempt the task yourself while a coach observes and provides immediate, specific feedback on process.
    Cognitive Apprenticeship: Learning by Making Thinking Visible

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