Coaching practices for How Do I Stop Feeling Overwhelmed Some Days it Seems Like I Just Can't Control What is Happening in My Life

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Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?

• My whole day gets eaten by churning over an outcome that’s months away and totally out of my hands, while the few small things I could actually do today go untouched
• I’m churning over this whole tangle of worry as one undifferentiated mass of dread, and I’ve never stopped to sort out which parts I can actually do something about and which I can’t
• My worry about this whole situation is one tangled knot where the parts I could actually do something about and the parts that are completely out of my hands are all fused together, so I spin on all of it at once and act on none of it.
• I lie awake churning over one big looming thing
• No matter how hard I grind, the list never clears

Practices that may help

1. Focus daily energy on what is within today’s influence
   When the ultimate outcome is uncertain and distant, redirect attention to the present-moment actions that are completely within your control.
   The Stockdale Paradox, Made Practical
2. Classify every concern as within or outside your control
   Before reacting to any difficulty, ask the diagnostic question: "Is this actually within my influence?"
   The Serenity Prayer as a Practice Framework
3. Sort the situation into controllables and uncontrollables
   Split any stressful situation into what you can influence and what you can’t, then act only on the first list.
   Locus of Control: Building a Sense of Agency
4. The control sort
   For any stressor, explicitly list what is up to you and what is not — then put all attention on the first list.
   The Dichotomy of Control: Epictetus’ Central Lesson
5. Audit and renegotiate your commitments
   Regularly review what you have agreed to and honestly eliminate what you cannot do.
   Do It Tomorrow, Made Practical
6. Habit 1: Be proactive
   Take responsibility for your responses; act on what you can control, not on what happens to you.
   The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Made Practical
7. Acceptance (willingness)
   Make room for unwanted feelings instead of struggling against them, so they stop running the show.
   Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), Made Practical
8. Systematically process the backlog
   Work through old, unfinished tasks in order rather than perpetually re-triaging them.
   Do It Tomorrow, Made Practical
9. Clear a space
   Set down each burden one by one to find the calm place underneath them.
   Focusing and the Felt Sense, Made Practical
10. Worry stimulus control: confine worry to a designated time
    Schedule a 20-minute daily "worry period" and postpone all worry outside it.
    Worry Exposure, Made Practical

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