Coaching practices for How to Cope with Loss

Describe almost anything you are working through and IX Coach finds the practices whose real-world fit is closest. For How to Cope with Loss, these are the strongest matches in the current practice library.

Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?

• Nobody in my life gets this kind of loss, and I’m starting to ache for even one person who’s been through the exact same thing and wouldn’t need me to explain why it matters.
• I keep my head down and stay busy so I never actually feel the loss, and now it ambushes me at random and won’t metabolize
• They handled the money, or the cooking, or were just the person I leaned on
• Everyone keeps telling me to move on and get over the loss, but the grief is huge and it won’t go
• I’ve kept this loss a secret because I’m bracing for someone to brush it off, but holding it in is its own weight

Practices that may help

1. Find a community that recognises your specific loss
   Seek out people who have experienced the same type of loss — online or in person.
   Disenfranchised Grief, Made Practical
2. Deliberately engage loss-oriented work
   Set aside dedicated time to directly face the grief — the emotions, the absence, the meaning of the loss.
   The Dual Process Model of Grief, Made Practical
3. Task 3: Adjust to a world without the person
   Actively develop new skills, roles, and identity elements to navigate the changed life.
   Worden’s Tasks of Mourning, Made Practical
4. Treating grief as a form of gratitude
   When something ends and you feel grief, recognise that the grief is proportional to the love — and let it be both.
   Mono no Aware: The Pathos of Things
5. Practice speaking about the loss to people outside your immediate circle
   Gradually widen the circle of people who know about the loss and can offer recognition.
   Disenfranchised Grief, Made Practical
6. Reframing loss as transformation
   When something ends or is lost, practise asking what it is becoming rather than only mourning what it was.
   Zhuangzi and the Practice of Perspective Shift
7. Look honestly for what has grown or changed for the better
   Without minimising the loss, notice any growth, change, or perspective that has emerged from it.
   Meaning Reconstruction in Grief, Made Practical
8. Task 2: Work through the pain of grief
   Allow and process the emotional and physical pain of loss rather than bypassing it.
   Worden’s Tasks of Mourning, Made Practical
9. Carry forward the person’s legacy in your own life
   Identify values, projects, or commitments the person cared about and carry them forward yourself.
   Continuing Bonds in Grief, Made Practical
10. Create private rituals for losses that have no public ceremony
    Design your own mourning practice for a loss that comes with no cultural script.
    Disenfranchised Grief, Made Practical

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