Coaching practices for The Ladder of Inference with My Partner
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Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?
- We keep going in circles arguing about who’s right, both certain
- I’ve already decided what’s going on and I’m about to act on it
- My conclusion only makes sense because of a bunch of things I’m silently taking for granted about people and how the world works
- I’ve held this view of someone for so long that it’s become self-confirming
- I’ve been trying to teach myself this entirely alone and I keep stalling at the same walls
Practices that may help
- The Ladder of Inference
Chris Argyris's ladder of inference describes the rapid, largely invisible mental journey from raw observable data to a firmly held belief and action — selecting data, interpreting it, making assumptions, drawing conclusions, and acting, often in seconds. The practice is to slow this climb and check each rung, especially in high-stakes situations where conclusions feel certain but may be built on shaky selections and assumptions. - Walk down the ladder together in disagreements
In conflict, stop arguing about conclusions and descend together to the data level.
The Ladder of Inference - Test conclusions before acting on them
Treat your conclusion as a hypothesis and find one piece of evidence that would confirm or disconfirm it.
The Ladder of Inference - Surface and examine the assumptions you are making
Name the assumptions filling the gap between the data you selected and the interpretation you reached.
The Ladder of Inference - Slow the reflexive loop
Your current beliefs shape which data you select, reinforcing themselves — interrupt this loop deliberately.
The Ladder of Inference - Learn with someone more capable than you
A skilled partner lifts your performance into new territory you cannot reach alone.
Zone of Proximal Development: Learning at Your Real Edge - Notice which data you selected — and which you ignored
Your conclusions are built on a sample of the available data — ask what the sample excluded.
The Ladder of Inference - Map every link in the chain — thoughts, feelings, urges, actions
Walk from the prompting event to the problem behavior one step at a time, naming each link explicitly.
Behavioral Chain Analysis: The DBT Method for Understanding Problem Behaviors - Expert-explanation comparison
After explaining a concept yourself, compare your explanation to an expert’s and locate the differences.
Illusion of Explanatory Depth: You Know Less Than You Think - Red-team joint scenarios before betting on them
Before acting on a conjunction ("X will happen AND Y will follow"), assign a skeptic to attack the "and."
The Conjunction Fallacy — When "More Details" Feels More Likely
Related concerns
- Ladder Of Inference Conflict
In conflict, stop arguing about conclusions and descend together to the data level.
Walk down the ladder together in disagreements
- The Ladder Of Inference When Burned Out
Chris Argyris's ladder of inference describes the rapid, largely invisible mental journey from raw observable data to a firmly held belief and action — selecting data, interpreting it, making assumptions, drawing conclusions, and acting, often in seconds. The practice is to slow this climb and check each rung, especially in high-stakes situations where conclusions feel certain but may be built on shaky selections and assumptions.
- Ladder Of Inference Assumptions
Chris Argyris's ladder of inference describes the rapid, largely invisible mental journey from raw observable data to a firmly held belief and action — selecting data, interpreting it, making assumptions, drawing conclusions, and acting, often in seconds. The practice is to slow this climb and check each rung, especially in high-stakes situations where conclusions feel certain but may be built on shaky selections and assumptions.
- The Ladder Of Inference As A Caregiver
Chris Argyris's ladder of inference describes the rapid, largely invisible mental journey from raw observable data to a firmly held belief and action — selecting data, interpreting it, making assumptions, drawing conclusions, and acting, often in seconds. The practice is to slow this climb and check each rung, especially in high-stakes situations where conclusions feel certain but may be built on shaky selections and assumptions.
- The Ladder Of Inference At Work
Chris Argyris's ladder of inference describes the rapid, largely invisible mental journey from raw observable data to a firmly held belief and action — selecting data, interpreting it, making assumptions, drawing conclusions, and acting, often in seconds. The practice is to slow this climb and check each rung, especially in high-stakes situations where conclusions feel certain but may be built on shaky selections and assumptions.
- The Ladder Of Inference For My Teenager
Chris Argyris's ladder of inference describes the rapid, largely invisible mental journey from raw observable data to a firmly held belief and action — selecting data, interpreting it, making assumptions, drawing conclusions, and acting, often in seconds. The practice is to slow this climb and check each rung, especially in high-stakes situations where conclusions feel certain but may be built on shaky selections and assumptions.
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