Coaching practices for What Did This Give Me

Describe almost anything you are working through and IX Coach finds the practices whose real-world fit is closest. For What Did This Give Me, these are the strongest matches in the current practice library.

Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?

• The worst has passed and I genuinely want to know if this gave me anything real
• This habit gives me nothing in the moment, so I never do it
• I’ve been feeling flat and low and I’m drawn to throwing myself into something intense and bracing to shock myself out of it
• I give people things but it always comes out as a quick transaction
• I eat while scrolling, watch while texting, take my pleasures with my attention split a dozen ways

Practices that may help

1. Conduct a genuine benefit audit — not a positivity performance
   Ask "What, if anything, has this experience actually given me?" with full permission to answer "nothing I can see yet."
   Benefit-Finding in Adversity, Made Practical
2. GIVE: DBT’s Skill for Preserving Relationships During Difficult Conversations
   GIVE — Gentle, Interested, Validate, Easy manner — is a DBT interpersonal effectiveness skill developed by Marsha Linehan for keeping relationships intact during difficult exchanges. While DEAR MAN focuses on getting what you need, GIVE focuses on how you show up so the other person remains willing to engage with you over time.
3. Points and reward systems
   Award yourself points for completing the habit, redeemable for real rewards.
   Gamification of Habits
4. Cold immersion for mood
   Brief whole-body cold (plunge or bath) used to lift mood and shift state.
   Cold Exposure, Without the Hype
5. Give in ways that strengthen social connection
   Make your giving a moment of relationship, not a transaction.
   Prosocial Spending: Why Giving Boosts Happiness
6. Sharpening perception and blocking distraction
   Heighten one sense and shut out interruptions to intensify a good experience.
   Savoring: Getting More From the Good
7. Generosity and giving to others
   Use time, money, or attention for others’ benefit rather than your own.
   Self-Transcendence: Beyond the Self
8. Identifying and Targeting the Trauma Memory
   Pinpoint the specific memory, its worst moment (the "touchstone"), and the negative belief it installed.
   EMDR: Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing
9. Make the gift personal and unexpected
   Unsolicited, personal gifts generate more reciprocity obligation than generic or expected ones.
   The Rule of Reciprocity, Made Practical
10. Close the favor with specific, sincere gratitude
    Specific thanks reinforces the helper’s positive self-attribution and deepens the effect.
    The Ben Franklin Effect, Made Practical

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