Coaching practices for My Old List of Goals is Cluttered with Stuff I Wanted Years Ago and Don't Anymore and Every Time I Glance at it I Just Feel a Wash of Guilt About All the Unticked Boxes Instead of it Being a Living Thing That Reflects What I Actually Want Now
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Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?
- My old list of goals is cluttered with stuff I wanted years ago and don’t anymore, and every time I glance at it I just feel a wash of guilt about all the unticked boxes
- There’s a thing I’ve told myself I’ll do "someday" for years now
- My list of dreams is just one long undated jumble, and because nothing on it has a "when," it all feels equally far off and equally deferrable
- There are so many half-formed goals and someday-projects rattling around in my head that I can’t even see them clearly
- There’s this pile of old half-finished tasks I keep stepping over, and each one is its own little tug of guilt
Practices that may help
- Review and revise the bucket list quarterly
A list reviewed only at writing is nostalgia; one reviewed quarterly is a live planning document.
The Bucket List Method - Distinguish genuine deferral from disguised refusal
An item that has been on the someday list for two or more years is not deferred — it has been declined without being acknowledged.
The Someday List - Categorize list items by time horizon
Sort items into near (this year), medium (this decade), and distant — then schedule the near-term ones immediately.
The Bucket List Method - Write all 25 goals without editing
Brain-dump every goal, aspiration, and project you’re holding — professional and personal — uncensored.
Warren Buffett’s Two-List Strategy - Systematically process the backlog
Work through old, unfinished tasks in order rather than perpetually re-triaging them.
Do It Tomorrow, Made Practical - Review the someday list weekly — even briefly
An unreviewed someday list is a guilt pile; a reviewed one is a planning resource.
The Someday List - Review and update anti-goals annually as values evolve
Anti-goals based on your 28-year-old priorities may be wrong for your 38-year-old ones — review them explicitly.
Anti-Goals: Defining Success by What You Refuse to Accept - Run a quarterly focus review to refresh the lists
Revisit and rebuild both lists every quarter — priorities shift, and so should the lists.
Warren Buffett’s Two-List Strategy - Give someday items a time horizon to distinguish near and far
Not all someday items are equal — some are waiting for next month, others for retirement.
The Someday List - Use the someday list as a values barometer
What you keep adding to the someday list — and what you keep not doing — reveals what you actually value versus what you think you value.
The Someday List
Related concerns
- When Getting Things Done Clarify Next Action
For every captured item, decide what it is and the very next physical action.
Clarify each item into a concrete next action
- Bucket List Method
A bucket list, used seriously, forces clarity about what you actually want from your remaining time — not a fantasy wish list but a working inventory of experiences and goals that get scheduled, funded, and pursued. The method works best when it is grounded in temporal awareness (life is finite) and actively reviewed rather than written once and forgotten. Evidence is largely anecdotal and from life design practice; the underlying motivation mechanisms are real.
- Focus List Reminder
A someday list (popularized in David Allen’s Getting Things Done framework and common in life-design practice) is a trusted place to park valuable ideas, projects, and desires that are not actionable now without losing them or letting them occupy mental RAM. Its value depends entirely on the reviews being regular enough that you trust the list, and honest enough that it stays current. There is limited formal research on this specific tool, but the underlying capture-and-clarify mechanism is consistent with cognitive offloading research.
- Someday List Time Horizons
Not all someday items are equal — some are waiting for next month, others for retirement.
Give someday items a time horizon to distinguish near and far
- The Someday List During A Big Change
The someday list is not just a holding pen — it is a menu for the next season of life.
Activate someday items when life opens up, not just when you decide to
- The Someday List For My Teenager
Not all someday items are equal — some are waiting for next month, others for retirement.
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