Coaching practices for I Think I'm Passionate About the Things I'm Supposed to Want the Prestigious Impressive Sounding Ones but Honestly They Leave Me Drained and I Can't Tell Anymore What Actually Lights Me Up Versus What I Just Like the Idea of Loving
Describe almost anything you are working through and IX Coach finds the practices whose real-world fit is closest. For I Think I'm Passionate About the Things I'm Supposed to Want the Prestigious Impressive Sounding Ones but Honestly They Leave Me Drained and I Can't Tell Anymore What Actually Lights Me Up Versus What I Just Like the Idea of Loving, these are the strongest matches in the current practice library.
Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?
- I think I’m passionate about the things I’m supposed to want
- I keep judging whether something’s for me by whether it felt fun in the moment, but plenty of things feel pleasant and go nowhere
- I’ve got two or three things I’m genuinely into, and I keep feeling like having more than one means I’m scattered and unfocused
- My interest in this was strong while it was new and intellectually shiny, and now that the novelty’s worn off it’s fizzling
- I keep waiting to feel that spark before I really commit to anything, and it never shows up at the start
Practices that may help
- Test passion with the energy-after test
Passion is revealed by what energizes you after doing it — not by what you aspire to love.
The Hedgehog Concept - Track what makes you ask questions, not what makes you feel good
Curiosity is a better signal for developing passion than pleasure.
Passion vs Interest: How to Actually Find Work You Love - Allow multiple active interests without forcing a hierarchy
Having more than one developing interest is not a sign of lost focus — it’s how passion develops for many people.
Passion vs Interest: How to Actually Find Work You Love - Link developing interests to a sense of contribution
Interest that connects to helping others or solving real problems becomes more sustaining than interest that is purely self-contained.
Passion vs Interest: How to Actually Find Work You Love - Invest effort before expecting the passion to arrive
Passion follows competence — start before you feel ready, because the feeling comes after.
Passion vs Interest: How to Actually Find Work You Love - Develop interest, don’t just wait to find it
Deepen passion through engagement over time rather than expecting instant fit.
Grit: Passion and Perseverance, Honestly Assessed - Distinguish genuine interest from performed interest
Separate goals you are genuinely curious about from ones you believe you should be curious about.
Self-Concordant Goals, Made Practical - Follow genuine interest, not strategic interest
Pursue the thing that genuinely excites you — even if you cannot explain why or see how it fits.
The Creative Act: Rick Rubin’s Approach to Making - Prioritize skill gains that reveal more of the domain
Each layer of skill opens new parts of a domain you couldn’t see before — this is how interest deepens.
Passion vs Interest: How to Actually Find Work You Love - Passion vs Interest: How to Actually Find Work You Love
Paul O’Keefe and colleagues found that people who believe interests are fixed ("find your passion") tend to abandon pursuits when they get hard, while those who see interests as developed through effort stay curious and persistent. The evidence suggests "follow your passion" is not just unhelpful advice — it may actively discourage the effort that transforms shallow interest into deep, sustaining work.
Related concerns
- Develop Passion
Passion follows competence — start before you feel ready, because the feeling comes after.
Invest effort before expecting the passion to arrive
- Develop Your Passion
Passion follows competence — start before you feel ready, because the feeling comes after.
- Follow Your Interest
Paul O’Keefe and colleagues found that people who believe interests are fixed ("find your passion") tend to abandon pursuits when they get hard, while those who see interests as developed through effort stay curious and persistent. The evidence suggests "follow your passion" is not just unhelpful advice — it may actively discourage the effort that transforms shallow interest into deep, sustaining work.
- Follow Your Passion Research
Paul O’Keefe and colleagues found that people who believe interests are fixed ("find your passion") tend to abandon pursuits when they get hard, while those who see interests as developed through effort stay curious and persistent. The evidence suggests "follow your passion" is not just unhelpful advice — it may actively discourage the effort that transforms shallow interest into deep, sustaining work.
- Generalist Passion Development
Having more than one developing interest is not a sign of lost focus — it’s how passion develops for many people.
Allow multiple active interests without forcing a hierarchy
- How Passion Grows
Deepen passion through engagement over time rather than expecting instant fit.
Develop interest, don’t just wait to find it
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