Coaching practices for Almost All My Discretionary Money Goes to Treats for Myself and the Lift Fades Fast and I Notice the Moments I Actually Felt Good Were the Small Things I Did for Other People but I've Never Thought of Giving as Something That Belongs in My Own Budget
Describe almost anything you are working through and IX Coach finds the practices whose real-world fit is closest. For Almost All My Discretionary Money Goes to Treats for Myself and the Lift Fades Fast and I Notice the Moments I Actually Felt Good Were the Small Things I Did for Other People but I've Never Thought of Giving as Something That Belongs in My Own Budget, these are the strongest matches in the current practice library.
Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?
- Almost all my discretionary money goes to treats for myself and the lift fades fast, and I notice the moments I actually felt good were the small things I did for other people
- I tend to bottle up all my generosity for one big gesture at the holidays and then spend the rest of the year just spending on myself
- I keep buying myself things expecting a lift and the thrill is gone within a week
- I say family and health and experiences are what matter to me, but when I actually look at where my money goes it’s subscriptions and convenience and impulse buys
- My days revolve so tightly around my own needs that I feel a bit hollow
Practices that may help
- Allocate part of your values budget to others
Prosocial spending — money spent on others — generates more lasting satisfaction per dollar than equivalent self-spending.
Values-Based Spending, Made Practical - Give small amounts more often
Spread giving across frequent small acts rather than saving it for large ones.
Prosocial Spending: Why Giving Boosts Happiness - Invest in experiences rather than possessions
Experiential spending produces more lasting happiness than material spending of equivalent cost.
Time Affluence Practices (Cassie Holmes) - Align spending deliberately with stated values
Review each discretionary category against what you say matters most — and cut what doesn’t match.
The Latte Factor: Small Spending and the Cost of Habit - Generosity and giving to others
Use time, money, or attention for others’ benefit rather than your own.
Self-Transcendence: Beyond the Self - Give proportionally to stay in a state of abundance
Give at a level that feels generous without triggering deprivation — so you can keep giving.
Prosocial Spending: Why Giving Boosts Happiness - Cut costs mercilessly on things you don’t value
Spend extravagantly on your priorities and ruthlessly eliminate the rest.
Conscious Spending Plan, Made Practical - Give your full attention as a form of prosocial spending
Treat undivided attention as a resource you can intentionally spend on another person.
Prosocial Spending: Why Giving Boosts Happiness - Give experiences, not objects
Treat someone to a shared experience rather than buying them a thing.
Prosocial Spending: Why Giving Boosts Happiness - Protect the 30% wants budget as a deliberate allocation
Once the needs and savings are covered, the wants budget is yours to spend without guilt.
The 50/30/20 Budget: A Simple Framework for Where Your Money Goes
Related concerns
- Gifts Vs Materialism
Treat someone to a shared experience rather than buying them a thing.
Give experiences, not objects
- Spending On Others Happiness
Elizabeth Dunn and Michael Norton’s research found that spending money on others — "prosocial spending" — reliably produces more happiness than spending the same amount on oneself, across income levels and cultures. The effect is real and replicates, though it is not unlimited: how you give matters as much as whether you give.
- When Prosocial Spending Small Frequent Giving
Spread giving across frequent small acts rather than saving it for large ones.
Give small amounts more often
- Does Giving Money Make You Happy
Elizabeth Dunn and Michael Norton’s research found that spending money on others — "prosocial spending" — reliably produces more happiness than spending the same amount on oneself, across income levels and cultures. The effect is real and replicates, though it is not unlimited: how you give matters as much as whether you give.
- Prosocial Spending Why Giving Boosts Happiness During A Big Change
Elizabeth Dunn and Michael Norton’s research found that spending money on others — "prosocial spending" — reliably produces more happiness than spending the same amount on oneself, across income levels and cultures. The effect is real and replicates, though it is not unlimited: how you give matters as much as whether you give.
- Prosocial Spending Why Giving Boosts Happiness When Overwhelmed
Elizabeth Dunn and Michael Norton’s research found that spending money on others — "prosocial spending" — reliably produces more happiness than spending the same amount on oneself, across income levels and cultures. The effect is real and replicates, though it is not unlimited: how you give matters as much as whether you give.
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