Use affirmation of values, not affirmation of ability

Affirm that you are a good person with important values — not that you are good at the specific thing you are anxious about.

Why it works

Generic positive self-statements ("I am confident," "I am great at presentations") are often contradicted by the very anxiety that motivates them, which can increase distress through a contrast effect. Values affirmation works differently: it does not claim competence in the threatened domain but restores a broader sense of adequacy that makes the threat feel smaller. The key is that the affirmed material is already true and verifiable, not aspirational.

How to do it

1. When anxious, avoid repeating competence statements about the threatening domain.
2. Instead, choose one true statement about who you are in a different area: “I am a caring friend,” “I work hard at what matters to me.”
3. Write one specific piece of evidence for that statement from the last month.
4. Let that be enough — no arguing yourself into confidence about the threat.

Evidence

Research comparing generic positive self-statements to specific, values-based affirmations finds that the generic statements can backfire for people with low self-esteem, while values-based affirmation does not show the same rebound effect. (observational)

The backfire effect of positive self-statements is most pronounced for people with low self-esteem; for those with high self-esteem, generic positive statements tend to be neutral or mildly helpful.

Sources

• Wood, Perunovic & Lee (2009), positive self-statements: power for some, peril for others, Psychological Science

Common mistake

Believing any affirmation is self-affirmation in Steele’s sense — the theory is specific: it requires affirming a value that is genuinely held, not repeating a phrase about the threatened domain.