Coaching practices for How Do I Deal with Anxiety Attacks

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Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?

  • I always wait until I’m already in full panic to try to calm down, and by then it’s too far gone for anything to work
  • The second I feel my heart pound or my chest tighten I clench up and try to force it to stop, and the fighting just cranks it higher
  • I spend my days bracing for the next wave of it, scanning my body, dreading the moment it shows up
  • Even once the worst of it passes, I can’t get back into the room
  • I only ever try a new way to handle this once I’m already deep in a full-blown wave, and by then I’m too far gone to think

Practices that may help

  1. Use grounding before anxiety peaks, not after
    Start the technique at the first sign of anxiety — not once the wave is overwhelming.
    The 5-4-3-2-1 Grounding Technique
  2. Allow the sensations without resisting
    Let the physical feelings of anxiety be present instead of bracing against them.
    The DARE Response to Anxiety, Made Practical
  3. Run toward the feeling
    Actively invite more of the anxiety rather than waiting nervously for it to pass.
    The DARE Response to Anxiety, Made Practical
  4. Engage with the present moment
    Once the edge comes off, redirect attention fully into an activity or your surroundings.
    The DARE Response to Anxiety, Made Practical
  5. Rehearse the response before you need it
    Learn and practice the four steps in low-stakes moments so they are available under pressure.
    The DARE Response to Anxiety, Made Practical
  6. Conduct a post-panic review to counter catastrophic memory
    After every attack, record what actually happened — because anxiety memory is biased toward danger.
    Panic Surfing
  7. Use somatic tracking instead of distraction
    Observe sensations with neutral curiosity rather than distracting from them — the curiosity interrupts the threat appraisal.
    Panic Surfing
  8. Allow the sensations instead of fighting them
    Do not try to stop the racing heart, the dizziness, the breathlessness — allow them and observe.
    Panic Surfing
  9. The DARE Response to Anxiety, Made Practical
    The DARE response, popularized by Barry McDonagh, is an acceptance-based way to meet anxiety and panic: Defuse the scary thought, Allow the sensations without resisting, Run toward (rather than away from) the feeling, and Engage with life again. Its logic lines up with what exposure- and acceptance-based approaches do — you stop reinforcing fear by fighting or fleeing it. These are self-help skills for everyday anxiety; for severe or persistent panic, work alongside a qualified professional.
  10. Stay in the situation for the full arc
    Leave only after the attack has peaked and begun to subside — not in the middle, no matter how strong the urge.
    Panic Surfing

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