Coaching practices for How to Build Trust Back in a Relationship

Describe almost anything you are working through and IX Coach finds the practices whose real-world fit is closest. For How to Build Trust Back in a Relationship, these are the strongest matches in the current practice library.

Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?

• I won’t hand anyone real responsibility until they’ve completely proven themselves first
• To smooth things over I say "sounds good," "I’m fine with it," "I understand" when none of it is actually true
• With new people I try to fast-forward to being close
• Trust with this person has cracked and I just keep apologizing for "not being trustworthy" in this big vague way
• Something’s damaged my trust in them but I can’t bring myself to just say so, so instead I quietly pull back, vent to other people, and let it fester

Practices that may help

1. Extend trust deliberately to invite it
   Trust others first, in bounded ways, before they have earned every dimension — it is how trust is built.
   The Trust Triangle
2. Build sincerity by saying only what you mean
   Only make commitments and assertions you actually believe — and retract the ones you don’t.
   The Trust Triangle
3. Earn the right to deepen the relationship in stages
   Trust compounds over time — start with technical credibility and expand into intimacy as it is earned.
   The Trust Equation, Made Practical
4. Diagnose which trust dimension is broken before trying to repair
   Name the specific trust assessment that failed — then address that one, not trust in general.
   The Trust Triangle
5. The Trust Triangle
   Charles Feltman’s Trust Triangle (from The Thin Book of Trust) identifies four distinct assessments that together constitute trust: sincerity (I mean what I say), reliability (I do what I say), competence (I have the ability to do what I say), and care (I have your interests at heart). Trust breaks down when any one of these assessments fails — and repairing trust requires identifying which assessment was damaged.
6. Have explicit trust conversations when trust is at stake
   Name the trust issue directly rather than managing it indirectly.
   The Trust Triangle
7. The Trust Equation, Made Practical
   The Trust Equation (Maister, Green, and Galford) holds that trustworthiness = (credibility + reliability + intimacy) ÷ self-orientation. The model is a practitioner framework rather than a rigorously tested theory, but it usefully names the levers — especially self-orientation, which is the single biggest trust-killer most leaders overlook.
8. Build reliability through small, visible commitments
   Reliability is built not by big promises but by flawlessly keeping small, everyday ones.
   The Trust Equation, Made Practical
9. Lower your guard to raise the intimacy score
   Sharing something real about yourself makes others feel safer sharing something real with you.
   The Trust Equation, Made Practical
10. Demonstrate care through visible acts in the other person’s interest
    Show that your interests and theirs are genuinely aligned — not only when it’s convenient.
    The Trust Triangle

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