Coaching practices for Possible Selves with Friends
Describe almost anything you are working through and IX Coach finds the practices whose real-world fit is closest. For Possible Selves with Friends, these are the strongest matches in the current practice library.
Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?
- The future I want for myself feels so out of reach that part of me has filed it under "people like me don’t get there"
- The inspiring vision of who I want to be gets me fired up for a day or two and then quietly fades
- I’ve got this clear, vivid picture of the person I want to become, and I love daydreaming about them
- I’m still grinding toward a version of "successful me" I dreamed up years ago, and it’s stopped lighting me up
- When I try to picture myself old it’s just a blank, fuzzy outline
Practices that may help
- Possible Selves, Made Practical
Hazel Markus’s possible-selves framework holds that motivation is driven not only by who we are now but by vivid mental representations of who we could become — including hoped-for and feared future selves. These cognitive structures provide direction and energy for behavior, and deliberately developing them is a tractable approach to sustained motivation. - Find living examples of your hoped-for self
Identify real people who embody your hoped-for self — their existence makes the representation concrete and credible.
Possible Selves, Made Practical - Future Self Continuity, Made Practical
Hal Hershfield’s research shows that most people experience their future self as a stranger — neurologically similar to perceiving another person rather than themselves. This psychological distance explains impulsive decisions that trade future wellbeing for present comfort. Practices that increase felt connection to the future self reduce this discounting and improve decisions ranging from saving to health behavior. - Pair the hoped-for self with a feared counterpart
Identify the feared version of your future self in the same domain — the pairing produces more sustained motivation than hope alone.
Possible Selves, Made Practical - Build a behavioral bridge to the possible self
Identify one specific behavior your hoped-for self does that you can do today — then do it.
Possible Selves, Made Practical - Update and revise possible selves over time
Revisit and rewrite your possible selves at least twice a year — the self you need to become changes as you grow.
Possible Selves, Made Practical - Vividly visualize your future self in concrete detail
The more specific and sensory your image of your future self, the less you discount their wellbeing.
Future Self Continuity, Made Practical - Write a letter from your future self
Have your 80-year-old self write back about the decision you’re facing now.
The Regret-Minimization Framework - Run prototyping conversations before committing to a plan
Talk to people already living your Plan B or C before you decide whether to pursue it.
Odyssey Plans: Designing Three Alternative Futures - Consult your future self
Imagine your wiser future self looking back on this moment, and ask what they’d want you to do.
Self-Distancing: Thinking Clearly About Your Own Problems
Related concerns
- Possible Selves Elaboration
Hazel Markus’s possible-selves framework holds that motivation is driven not only by who we are now but by vivid mental representations of who we could become — including hoped-for and feared future selves. These cognitive structures provide direction and energy for behavior, and deliberately developing them is a tractable approach to sustained motivation.
- Possible Selves For My Teenager
Identify real people who embody your hoped-for self — their existence makes the representation concrete and credible.
Find living examples of your hoped-for self
- Possible Selves Pairing
Hazel Markus’s possible-selves framework holds that motivation is driven not only by who we are now but by vivid mental representations of who we could become — including hoped-for and feared future selves. These cognitive structures provide direction and energy for behavior, and deliberately developing them is a tractable approach to sustained motivation.
- Possible Selves Theory
Hazel Markus’s possible-selves framework holds that motivation is driven not only by who we are now but by vivid mental representations of who we could become — including hoped-for and feared future selves. These cognitive structures provide direction and energy for behavior, and deliberately developing them is a tractable approach to sustained motivation.
- Possible Selves With My Team
Hazel Markus’s possible-selves framework holds that motivation is driven not only by who we are now but by vivid mental representations of who we could become — including hoped-for and feared future selves. These cognitive structures provide direction and energy for behavior, and deliberately developing them is a tractable approach to sustained motivation.
- Possible Selves At Work
Hazel Markus’s possible-selves framework holds that motivation is driven not only by who we are now but by vivid mental representations of who we could become — including hoped-for and feared future selves. These cognitive structures provide direction and energy for behavior, and deliberately developing them is a tractable approach to sustained motivation.
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