Coaching practices for Situational Leadership for My Teenager

Describe almost anything you are working through and IX Coach finds the practices whose real-world fit is closest. For Situational Leadership for My Teenager, these are the strongest matches in the current practice library.

Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?

• I’ve quietly filed each person on my team as strong or weak, and then I’m baffled when my "strong" one flounders on something new
• Every little thing turns into a power struggle because my kid wants to control everything, and I’m stuck between bossing them through the whole day or handing them a freedom they’re not ready for
• My team is genuinely running well without me now, but I keep inserting myself into decisions they could make
• Every conversation with my kid about their behavior turns into me laying down the law and them digging in, and I want a way to actually talk it through together

Practices that may help

1. Situational Leadership, Made Practical
   Situational Leadership, developed by Paul Hersey and Ken Blanchard, says the right leadership style depends on the follower’s readiness for a given task: match how much you direct versus support to where the person actually is. It is enormously popular in corporate training, but its empirical support is genuinely weak — treat it as a useful thinking tool, not a validated law.
2. Supporting — step back on direction, stay high on support
   For the capable-but-cautious performer, lighten the instructions and bolster their confidence.
   Situational Leadership, Made Practical
3. Coaching — high direction and high support for the disillusioned learner
   When early enthusiasm dips but skill is still forming, combine clear guidance with active encouragement.
   Situational Leadership, Made Practical
4. Assess readiness task by task, not person by person
   Rate competence and commitment for the specific task in front of them, not the person overall.
   Situational Leadership, Made Practical
5. Directing — high direction for the eager novice
   With someone new and keen but unskilled, give clear, specific instruction and tight structure.
   Situational Leadership, Made Practical
6. Delegating — hand over both direction and decision
   With a skilled, committed performer, give the goal and the authority, then get out of the way.
   Situational Leadership, Made Practical
7. Give age-appropriate autonomy within non-negotiable limits
   Let the child choose within the boundaries you set — the choice builds competence; the boundary provides safety.
   Authoritative Parenting (Diana Baumrind)
8. Build the flexibility to switch styles
   The skill the model actually demands is style range — most leaders overuse one default.
   Situational Leadership, Made Practical
9. Performing: step back and protect the conditions
   A Performing team needs air cover and resources, not direction.
   Tuckman’s Stages of Team Development
10. Use Plan B: the three-step collaborative conversation
    Empathize with the child’s concern, share yours, and invite them to solve it together.
    Collaborative Problem Solving (Ross Greene)

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