Interdependence as a daily relational practice

See every interaction as a mutual arising — you are not encountering a fixed person but a process that is partly shaped by your presence.

Why it works

If all phenomena arise dependently, so does the person you are interacting with in this moment. Their behaviour is partly a function of the conditions you are providing — your tone, your assumptions, your openness or guardedness. Holding this insight prevents the reification of others ("she is just like that") and opens genuine responsiveness to the fact that your presence is part of the causal web.

How to do it

1. Before a difficult conversation, remind yourself: "Who they are in this moment is partly conditioned by how I am showing up."
2. After an interaction, ask: "What conditions did I introduce? Did I create the conditions for openness or defensiveness?"
3. Do not use this as self-blame; use it as agency — you are a genuine condition in every interaction.

Evidence

Relational framing of interactions — recognising mutual influence — is consistent with intersubjective approaches in psychotherapy (Stolorow, Orange) and with social psychological evidence that interaction partners systematically influence each other's behaviour. (mechanistic)

Intersubjective therapy research is largely case-based; this practice is a philosophical application of dependent origination, not a tested protocol.

Common mistake

Treating interdependence as reducing individual agency ("nothing is my fault because everything is dependent") — the teaching is the opposite: your conditions genuinely matter.