Probe for interests, not positions

Ask why the other side wants what they say they want before responding to what they say.

Why it works

Positions are claimed outcomes (“I need $80k”); interests are the underlying needs that position is meant to satisfy (“I need to cover rent and save for a car”). When parties expose interests, they often discover the overlap or complementarity that makes a trade possible. Staying at the position level eliminates options before they can be seen.

How to do it

1. State your own interest, not just your position, early in the conversation.
2. Ask "What’s driving that number for you?" or "What would having that solve for you?"
3. Listen for multiple interests behind a single stated position — there are usually several.
4. Map the interests of both sides before proposing anything.

Evidence

The distinction between interests and positions is foundational to the Harvard Negotiation Project and is consistent with dual-concern theory, which shows that attending to both sides’ concerns predicts better joint outcomes than positional bargaining. De Dreu, Weingart and Kwon’s meta-analysis quantifies this: a prosocial motivation to attend to both sides’ interests reliably raises joint gains across studies. (observational)

Most evidence is from structured negotiation exercises and practitioner observation; controlled trials isolating this single move are limited.

Sources

• Fisher, Ury & Patton (1991), Getting to Yes — the foundational interests-vs-positions framework
• De Dreu, C. K. W., Weingart, L. R., & Kwon, S. (2000). Influence of social motives on integrative negotiation: A meta-analytic review and test of two theories. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 78(5), 889–905.

Common mistake

Asking “why do you want that?” in a tone that reads as challenge rather than curiosity, which causes the other side to defend their position more rigidly.