Coaching practices for Cross Domain Affirmation

Describe almost anything you are working through and IX Coach finds the practices whose real-world fit is closest. For Cross Domain Affirmation, these are the strongest matches in the current practice library.

Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?

  • My whole identity has quietly collapsed into this one thing
  • Before any big evaluation my whole sense of worth narrows down to how I’ll perform in that one room, and if I bomb it I feel like I’m worthless as a person
  • I just bombed at something and I’m stuck swinging between making excuses for it and beating myself up over it
  • I keep telling myself "I’m great at this, I’ve got this" right before the thing I’m scared of, and it somehow makes me feel worse
  • They happily agreed to the little thing, so I figured the bigger ask was in the bag

Practices that may help

  1. Broaden your self-concept beyond one domain
    Actively maintain a multi-domain identity so no single failure can threaten your whole self-worth.
    Self-Affirmation Theory, Made Practical
  2. Use value-based self-affirmation before threatening evaluations
    Before a threatening evaluation, write for 10 minutes about a value that matters to you — unrelated to the domain being evaluated.
    Power Posing Revisited
  3. Affirm a different value after a failure
    When you fail in one area, actively invest in a domain where you know you contribute.
    Self-Affirmation Theory, Made Practical
  4. Use affirmation of values, not affirmation of ability
    Affirm that you are a good person with important values — not that you are good at the specific thing you are anxious about.
    Self-Affirmation Theory, Made Practical
  5. Keep the second request related to the first
    The foot-in-the-door effect is strongest when the small and large asks share a category.
    The Foot-in-the-Door Technique, Made Practical
  6. Map the relational structure, not the surface features
    Ask what relationships are shared between domains, not just what objects look similar.
    Analogical Reasoning
  7. Map your value hierarchy
    Rank what you most value so you can draw on the strongest affirmation when you need it.
    Self-Affirmation Theory, Made Practical
  8. Affirmations
    Repeat chosen statements about who you are and what you’re committed to.
    The Miracle Morning, Made Practical
  9. Explicitly asking your partner to treat you as your ideal self
    Name one quality of your ideal self and ask your partner to treat you as if you already have it.
    The Michelangelo Phenomenon: How Partners Sculpt Each Other
  10. Use values affirmation to counter stereotype threat
    When your social identity is under threat, a brief values reflection can protect performance.
    Self-Affirmation Theory, Made Practical

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