Coaching practices for How Do I Know What I Want in Life My Goals and My Dreams I'm Only Doing What I'm Told
Describe almost anything you are working through and IX Coach finds the practices whose real-world fit is closest. For How Do I Know What I Want in Life My Goals and My Dreams I'm Only Doing What I'm Told, these are the strongest matches in the current practice library.
Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?
- I’m busy chasing things but half of them feel like what I’m supposed to want, not what I actually do
- I’ve got this whole list of goals and I honestly can’t tell anymore which ones are mine versus which I took on to look right or quiet the guilt
- Every time I set goals they end up being what I think I’m supposed to want
- I have this stirring picture of the life I want but no idea how to turn it into anything I can actually do
- I’m busy every single day and somehow none of it adds up to anything
Practices that may help
- Values clarification
Name the directions you want your life to move in, distinct from goals you can check off.
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), Made Practical - Audit why you are pursuing each goal
Check whether each goal is driven by interest and values or by guilt and external pressure.
Self-Concordant Goals, Made Practical - Excavate core values before writing goals
Identify what you most fundamentally care about before deciding what you want — or goals will be other people’s.
The Life Crafting Intervention: Scripting Your Future Self - Translate the narrative into domain-specific goals
Break the future-life story into one concrete goal per life domain.
The Life Crafting Intervention: Scripting Your Future Self - Habit 2: Begin with the end in mind
Define what success looks like before you act, guided by a personal mission.
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Made Practical - Distinguish genuine interest from performed interest
Separate goals you are genuinely curious about from ones you believe you should be curious about.
Self-Concordant Goals, Made Practical - Wayfinding with a Good Time Journal
Track when you feel engaged and energized to find direction from data, not a sudden epiphany.
Designing Your Life, Made Practical - Build a goal hierarchy from distant aim to proximal step
Link the immediate daily task to the long-range goal so effort on the small thing feels worth it.
Goal Setting Theory, Made Practical - Review and update anti-goals annually as values evolve
Anti-goals based on your 28-year-old priorities may be wrong for your 38-year-old ones — review them explicitly.
Anti-Goals: Defining Success by What You Refuse to Accept - Align your goals with the developmental task of your season
Goals that match what your season is asking produce energy; goals that fight the season drain it.
Seasons of Life
Related concerns
- How To Set Life Direction
Revisit and revise your best-possible-life narrative every 6–12 months as your context changes.
Periodic life-crafting refresh
- Evolving Life Goals
Anti-goals based on your 28-year-old priorities may be wrong for your 38-year-old ones — review them explicitly.
Review and update anti-goals annually as values evolve
- How Do I Know What I Want From Life
Name the directions you want your life to move in, distinct from goals you can check off.
Values clarification
- How To Find Goals You Care About
Identify what you most fundamentally care about before deciding what you want — or goals will be other people’s.
Excavate core values before writing goals
- Values Vs Goals Act
Return to your ranked values list every time a goal, project, or decision feels off-track.
Using your ranked values as a coaching north star
- When The Life Crafting Intervention Core Values Excavation
Identify what you most fundamentally care about before deciding what you want — or goals will be other people’s.
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