Coaching practices for How to Be More Dominant in a Wlw Relationship

Describe almost anything you are working through and IX Coach finds the practices whose real-world fit is closest. For How to Be More Dominant in a Wlw Relationship, these are the strongest matches in the current practice library.

Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?

  • I’ve folded so completely into us that I’m not sure I have a life of my own anymore
  • I dominate conversations without meaning to
  • Going into this hard conversation I want it all at once
  • There are people on my team I’ve quietly written off
  • Going into this hard talk I’m trying to win the point AND not hurt the relationship AND not feel like a doormat all at once, and the conversation just goes in circles

Practices that may help

  1. Cultivating mystery: becoming interesting to yourself first
    Invest in your own aliveness — your pursuits, pleasures, and personhood — not primarily to attract your partner, but because your vitality is the resource desire draws from.
    Mating in Captivity: Sustaining Desire in Long-Term Relationships
  2. Be a good listener; encourage others to talk about themselves
    Most people would rather have a great listener than a great talker.
    How to Win Friends and Influence People, Made Practical
  3. Balance FAST with DEAR MAN when the relationship and the goal are both at stake
    Use DEAR MAN for what you want, GIVE for the relationship, and FAST for yourself — and know which to weight when they conflict.
    FAST: DBT’s Skill for Maintaining Self-Respect in Relationships
  4. Deliberately expand your inner circle
    Move team members from low-LMX to high-LMX through intentional relationship investment.
    Leader-Member Exchange (LMX), Made Practical
  5. Three-goals prioritization: objective, relationship, or self-respect?
    Before entering a difficult conversation, decide which of the three goals matters most right now.
    DBT Interpersonal Effectiveness: Getting What You Need Without Destroying the Relationship
  6. GIVE: maintaining the relationship while getting what you need
    Gentle, Interested, Validate, Easy manner — the relational container for any difficult conversation.
    DBT Interpersonal Effectiveness: Getting What You Need Without Destroying the Relationship
  7. Explicitly asking your partner to treat you as your ideal self
    Name one quality of your ideal self and ask your partner to treat you as if you already have it.
    The Michelangelo Phenomenon: How Partners Sculpt Each Other
  8. Talking about desire without killing it
    Name what you want without reducing it to a problem to be solved or a complaint to be managed.
    Mating in Captivity: Sustaining Desire in Long-Term Relationships
  9. Identify your dominant leadership strengths — and lead from them
    Know which of the four leadership domains you naturally operate from and amplify it rather than trying to be equally strong in all four.
    Strengths-Based Leadership, Made Practical
  10. Mapping shared and divergent values in a relationship
    Do the card sort alongside someone important to you and compare — do not assume your rankings match.
    Values Card Sort

Related concerns

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