Coaching practices for How to Find Your Personal Values Goals and Beliefs How Do You Know If They Are Right for You
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Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?
- Every time I set goals they end up being what I think I’m supposed to want
- There’s a goal I keep flogging myself to pursue and it just won’t stick
- If someone asked me what I actually care about, I’m not sure I could answer honestly
- I drift through my days reacting to whatever’s loudest and I’ve lost the thread of what actually matters to me
- I’m busy chasing things but half of them feel like what I’m supposed to want, not what I actually do
Practices that may help
- Values Clarification, Made Practical
Values clarification is the work of naming what matters most to you, sorting the genuine priorities from the inherited ones, and using them to guide real choices. The methods — card sorts, ranking, value-consistent action — draw heavily on values work in acceptance-and-commitment therapy (ACT), which has clinical support; living in line with your values correlates with wellbeing in observational research. - Excavate core values before writing goals
Identify what you most fundamentally care about before deciding what you want — or goals will be other people’s.
The Life Crafting Intervention: Scripting Your Future Self - Using your ranked values as a coaching north star
Return to your ranked values list every time a goal, project, or decision feels off-track.
Values Card Sort - Values clarification: what matters most to you?
Identify 3–5 core values — not what you should value, but what actually matters when life is stripped back.
Values-Based Action (ACT), Made Practical - Clarify values and choose them actively
Name what genuinely matters to you — not what should matter — and make it a live choice today.
Psychological Flexibility, Made Practical - Values clarification
Name the directions you want your life to move in, distinct from goals you can check off.
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), Made Practical - Review and update anti-goals annually as values evolve
Anti-goals based on your 28-year-old priorities may be wrong for your 38-year-old ones — review them explicitly.
Anti-Goals: Defining Success by What You Refuse to Accept - Use the eulogy / future-self lens
Imagine how you’d want to be remembered to reveal the values you’d defend most.
Values Clarification, Made Practical - Values clarification through lived evidence
Infer your actual values from your past behaviour, not from what you wish you valued.
Svadhyaya: Self-Study as a Daily Practice - Map your values across the four life domains
Write one core value statement for each domain — work, relationships, personal growth, leisure — before touching the bullseye.
Values Bullseye, Made Practical
Related concerns
- How To Discover Your Values At 50
Imagine how you’d want to be remembered to reveal the values you’d defend most.
Use the eulogy / future-self lens
- Define Your Values
Imagine how you’d want to be remembered to reveal the values you’d defend most.
- How Can I Find What My Personal Values Are
Identify 3–5 core values — not what you should value, but what actually matters when life is stripped back.
Values clarification: what matters most to you?
- How Do I Identify My Personal Values And What Would Be The Benefit
Values clarification is the work of naming what matters most to you, sorting the genuine priorities from the inherited ones, and using them to guide real choices. The methods — card sorts, ranking, value-consistent action — draw heavily on values work in acceptance-and-commitment therapy (ACT), which has clinical support; living in line with your values correlates with wellbeing in observational research.
- How Do You Uncover Your Core Values And Learn How To Live Them To The Fullest
Values clarification is the work of naming what matters most to you, sorting the genuine priorities from the inherited ones, and using them to guide real choices. The methods — card sorts, ranking, value-consistent action — draw heavily on values work in acceptance-and-commitment therapy (ACT), which has clinical support; living in line with your values correlates with wellbeing in observational research.
- How To Choose Your Values
Force a strict order among your finalists so conflicts resolve in advance.
Rank your top values
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