Coaching practices for Meeting Your Own Needs
Describe almost anything you are working through and IX Coach finds the practices whose real-world fit is closest. For Meeting Your Own Needs, these are the strongest matches in the current practice library.
Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?
- I run myself into the ground taking care of everyone else and I’m always the last person on my own list
- There’s this constant background hum of "I need more
- I keep swallowing what I actually want and going along to keep the peace, and every time I stay silent against my own wishes it quietly tells me my needs don’t matter
- This used to be something I wanted, but ever since my boss started tracking it and someone’s always checking in, it’s curdled into a chore I do for them
- Every time I set goals they end up being what I think I’m supposed to want
Practices that may help
- Fierce provision: identify and meet your own needs
Ask yourself what you need right now and take action to supply it — without waiting to be asked.
Fierce Self-Compassion, Made Practical - Practice the wealth of wanting little (autarkeia)
Regularly inventory what you already have and ask whether it is actually sufficient.
The Stoic Discipline of Desire - The practice of self-assertiveness
Honor your wants, needs, and values by expressing them in the world — appropriately and openly.
The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem, Made Practical - Protect your sense of autonomy while pursuing the goal
Keep the goal yours even when a coach, boss, or partner is involved in it.
Self-Concordant Goals, Made Practical - Excavate core values before writing goals
Identify what you most fundamentally care about before deciding what you want — or goals will be other people’s.
The Life Crafting Intervention: Scripting Your Future Self - Share what you’ll need from your partner in the week ahead
Prevent unmet needs by making them visible before they become a complaint.
The Relationship Check-In: A Structured Practice for Staying Connected - Be Fair: include yourself in the fairness you extend to others
Apply the same standards of fairness to yourself that you would to someone you respect.
FAST: DBT’s Skill for Maintaining Self-Respect in Relationships - Celebrate growth, not just goal attainment
Recognize progress in who you are becoming, not only whether you hit the number.
Self-Concordant Goals, Made Practical - Self-Concordant Goals, Made Practical
Self-concordant goals, from Kennon Sheldon, are goals you pursue because they express who you genuinely are or what truly interests you — not because of guilt, social pressure, or external reward. Research finds that self-concordant goals are pursued with more sustained effort and produce greater well-being when achieved, even when the objective difficulty is held constant. - Put the growth of others first
Start from "how do I help this person succeed?" rather than "how do they help me succeed?"
Servant Leadership, Made Practical
Related concerns
- Goal Setting Contentment
Pursue goals without making your contentment contingent on achieving them.
Holding contentment and ambition simultaneously
- Kennon Sheldon Goals
Self-concordant goals, from Kennon Sheldon, are goals you pursue because they express who you genuinely are or what truly interests you — not because of guilt, social pressure, or external reward. Research finds that self-concordant goals are pursued with more sustained effort and produce greater well-being when achieved, even when the objective difficulty is held constant.
- Self Concordance And Happiness
Self-concordant goals, from Kennon Sheldon, are goals you pursue because they express who you genuinely are or what truly interests you — not because of guilt, social pressure, or external reward. Research finds that self-concordant goals are pursued with more sustained effort and produce greater well-being when achieved, even when the objective difficulty is held constant.
- Self Concordance Motivation
Self-concordant goals, from Kennon Sheldon, are goals you pursue because they express who you genuinely are or what truly interests you — not because of guilt, social pressure, or external reward. Research finds that self-concordant goals are pursued with more sustained effort and produce greater well-being when achieved, even when the objective difficulty is held constant.
- Self Concordant Goals As A Parent
Self-concordant goals, from Kennon Sheldon, are goals you pursue because they express who you genuinely are or what truly interests you — not because of guilt, social pressure, or external reward. Research finds that self-concordant goals are pursued with more sustained effort and produce greater well-being when achieved, even when the objective difficulty is held constant.
- Self Concordant Goals At Work
Self-concordant goals, from Kennon Sheldon, are goals you pursue because they express who you genuinely are or what truly interests you — not because of guilt, social pressure, or external reward. Research finds that self-concordant goals are pursued with more sustained effort and produce greater well-being when achieved, even when the objective difficulty is held constant.
Describe your situation in your own words to search the complete practice library.