Coaching practices for Principled Negotiation for My Teenager
Describe almost anything you are working through and IX Coach finds the practices whose real-world fit is closest. For Principled Negotiation for My Teenager, these are the strongest matches in the current practice library.
Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?
- The second they push back I either cave completely or harden into all-or-nothing, because I walked in without ever deciding what I could actually live with
- Every conversation with my kid about their behavior turns into me laying down the law and them digging in, and I want a way to actually talk it through together
- We’re treating this like there’s one pie to fight over and someone has to lose
- This has turned into a pure contest of who’s more stubborn, and whoever caves first "loses"
- Every time I push back on the terms it somehow turns into them feeling attacked, and then we’re fighting about us instead of the actual issue
Practices that may help
- Principled Negotiation, Made Practical
Principled negotiation, developed by Roger Fisher and William Ury in Getting to Yes, replaces positional bargaining with a method built on four elements: separate the people from the problem, focus on interests rather than positions, generate options for mutual gain, and insist on objective criteria. It aims for agreements that are better for both parties than their alternatives — without requiring either to capitulate or play hardball. - Negotiate: know your minimum and be willing to give and take
Decide in advance what you are willing to accept short of your full ask, and be ready to offer something in exchange.
DEAR MAN: DBT’s Skill for Asking for What You Want Effectively - Use Plan B: the three-step collaborative conversation
Empathize with the child’s concern, share yours, and invite them to solve it together.
Collaborative Problem Solving (Ross Greene) - Invent options for mutual gain
Brainstorm multiple possible deals before deciding, expanding the pie before splitting it.
Getting to Yes: Principled Negotiation - Insist on objective criteria
Anchor the deal to independent standards — market rates, precedent, expert opinion — not willpower.
Getting to Yes: Principled Negotiation - Separate the people from the problem
Address relationship concerns and substantive issues in different registers — treating people well and the problem hard.
Principled Negotiation, Made Practical - Getting to Yes: Principled Negotiation
Getting to Yes (Fisher & Ury, of the Harvard Negotiation Project) argues for negotiating on the merits instead of haggling over positions: separate people from the problem, focus on underlying interests, invent options for mutual gain, and judge outcomes by objective criteria — with your BATNA as the source of real leverage. It’s an influential framework grounded in decision theory and negotiation experience rather than a lab-tested protocol. - Separate the people from the problem
Be hard on the problem, soft on the people — attack the issue, not each other.
Getting to Yes: Principled Negotiation - Insist on objective criteria to evaluate options
Agree on an independent standard — market rate, precedent, expert opinion — before applying it to the specific deal.
Principled Negotiation, Made Practical - Invent options for mutual gain before selecting
Generate multiple creative options without commitment before evaluating any — the solution space is usually larger than the initial positions suggest.
Principled Negotiation, Made Practical
Related concerns
- Principled Negotiation As A Parent
Principled negotiation, developed by Roger Fisher and William Ury in Getting to Yes, replaces positional bargaining with a method built on four elements: separate the people from the problem, focus on interests rather than positions, generate options for mutual gain, and insist on objective criteria. It aims for agreements that are better for both parties than their alternatives — without requiring either to capitulate or play hardball.
- Principled Negotiation Before Bed
Principled negotiation, developed by Roger Fisher and William Ury in Getting to Yes, replaces positional bargaining with a method built on four elements: separate the people from the problem, focus on interests rather than positions, generate options for mutual gain, and insist on objective criteria. It aims for agreements that are better for both parties than their alternatives — without requiring either to capitulate or play hardball.
- Principled Negotiation During A Big Change
Principled negotiation, developed by Roger Fisher and William Ury in Getting to Yes, replaces positional bargaining with a method built on four elements: separate the people from the problem, focus on interests rather than positions, generate options for mutual gain, and insist on objective criteria. It aims for agreements that are better for both parties than their alternatives — without requiring either to capitulate or play hardball.
- Principled Negotiation In A New Job
Principled negotiation, developed by Roger Fisher and William Ury in Getting to Yes, replaces positional bargaining with a method built on four elements: separate the people from the problem, focus on interests rather than positions, generate options for mutual gain, and insist on objective criteria. It aims for agreements that are better for both parties than their alternatives — without requiring either to capitulate or play hardball.
- Principled Negotiation With My Partner
Address relationship concerns and substantive issues in different registers — treating people well and the problem hard.
Separate the people from the problem
- Principled Negotiation With My Team
Principled negotiation, developed by Roger Fisher and William Ury in Getting to Yes, replaces positional bargaining with a method built on four elements: separate the people from the problem, focus on interests rather than positions, generate options for mutual gain, and insist on objective criteria. It aims for agreements that are better for both parties than their alternatives — without requiring either to capitulate or play hardball.
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