Coaching practices for The Nurtured Heart Approach Howard Glasser Before Bed

Describe almost anything you are working through and IX Coach finds the practices whose real-world fit is closest. For The Nurtured Heart Approach Howard Glasser Before Bed, these are the strongest matches in the current practice library.

Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?

  • I want my child to carry a solid sense of who they are even when I’m not there to remind them
  • There are certain moments
  • I only ever speak up to my kid when something’s wrong
  • My child has gotten so used to being "the difficult one" that they act like it’s just who they are
  • Every night before bed looks completely different depending on my mood

Practices that may help

  1. The Nurtured Heart Approach (Howard Glasser)
    Howard Glasser’s Nurtured Heart Approach holds that intense, challenging children are energized children who have learned that misbehavior is the most reliable way to get adult attention and engagement. The method systematically reverses that pattern by delivering rich, specific recognition for positive moments and refusing to energize negative behavior. Evidence is primarily clinical and observational — RCTs are limited, but teacher and parent studies show meaningful reductions in behavioral referrals and improved classroom climate.
  2. Build the child’s inner wealth narrative over time
    Consistently reflect back who the child is becoming, not just what they’re doing.
    The Nurtured Heart Approach (Howard Glasser)
  3. Recognize what is not happening with proactive recognition
    Catch the child not misbehaving and name the success explicitly.
    The Nurtured Heart Approach (Howard Glasser)
  4. Deliver active recognition of ordinary positive moments
    Narrate what the child is doing right in real time, even when it is unremarkable.
    The Nurtured Heart Approach (Howard Glasser)
  5. Use experiential recognition to highlight strengths in the moment
    Catch the child demonstrating a virtue and name the virtue directly.
    The Nurtured Heart Approach (Howard Glasser)
  6. Anchor the wind-down with a consistent starting cue
    A repeated pre-sleep ritual — a specific tea, a book, a certain playlist — becomes a conditioned cue that induces sleepiness over time.
    The Wind-Down Routine: Engineering Your Path to Sleep
  7. Soothing Rhythm Breathing
    Use slow, rhythmic breathing to deliberately activate the physiological soothing system before other compassion practices.
    Compassion-Focused Therapy: Calming the Inner Critic
  8. Write three good things and their causes each evening
    Before sleep, write three specific good things that happened and — crucially — why each one happened.
    Three Good Things: The Evidence-Based Gratitude Practice
  9. The Havening Place (safe-place induction)
    Combine havening strokes with a vividly imagined calm location to deepen resource anchoring.
    Self-Havening: Calming the Nervous System Through Touch
  10. Use special time to fill the connection cup before problems escalate
    A proactive ten-minute connection recharge can prevent an afternoon of battles.
    Special Time (Lawrence Cohen — Playful Parenting)

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