Coaching practices for The Nurtured Heart Approach Howard Glasser When Overwhelmed

Describe almost anything you are working through and IX Coach finds the practices whose real-world fit is closest. For The Nurtured Heart Approach Howard Glasser When Overwhelmed, these are the strongest matches in the current practice library.

Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?

  • There are certain moments
  • I want my child to carry a solid sense of who they are even when I’m not there to remind them
  • Whatever I’m feeling, I pile on top of it
  • I understand exactly why I feel this way and I’ve looked at it honestly, but understanding it hasn’t made it hurt any less
  • I love someone who’s struggling and I keep swooping in to manage it all for them, but I’m starting to see that treating them like they can’t handle it might be quietly telling them they can’t

Practices that may help

  1. The Nurtured Heart Approach (Howard Glasser)
    Howard Glasser’s Nurtured Heart Approach holds that intense, challenging children are energized children who have learned that misbehavior is the most reliable way to get adult attention and engagement. The method systematically reverses that pattern by delivering rich, specific recognition for positive moments and refusing to energize negative behavior. Evidence is primarily clinical and observational — RCTs are limited, but teacher and parent studies show meaningful reductions in behavioral referrals and improved classroom climate.
  2. Recognize what is not happening with proactive recognition
    Catch the child not misbehaving and name the success explicitly.
    The Nurtured Heart Approach (Howard Glasser)
  3. Build the child’s inner wealth narrative over time
    Consistently reflect back who the child is becoming, not just what they’re doing.
    The Nurtured Heart Approach (Howard Glasser)
  4. N — Nurture with self-compassion
    Offer the part that is suffering what it most needs — care, acknowledgment, reassurance — as you would a dear friend.
    RAIN Meditation: Tara Brach’s Four-Step Practice
  5. RAIN — Nurture (offer what is needed)
    Give the hurting part the care it actually needs — a phrase, a hand on the heart, a kind tone.
    Radical Acceptance, Made Practical
  6. Trust their capacity to find their own way
    Hold the belief that they can move through this — don’t treat them as fragile or as a problem to manage.
    Holding Space
  7. How growth is supported (not forced)
    Growth, when it comes, is supported by safety, time, and being accompanied — never by pressure.
    Post-Traumatic Growth, Made Practical
  8. Use experiential recognition to highlight strengths in the moment
    Catch the child demonstrating a virtue and name the virtue directly.
    The Nurtured Heart Approach (Howard Glasser)
  9. Shift from one-person to two-person psychology
    Stop managing your distress alone and start managing it together.
    Secure-Functioning Relationships
  10. The self-compassion break (Neff’s three-step pause)
    In a hard moment: acknowledge, connect, and offer kindness — three breaths, three phrases.
    Working With Your Inner Critic

Related concerns

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