Coaching practices for How to Give Constructive Criticism
Describe almost anything you are working through and IX Coach finds the practices whose real-world fit is closest. For How to Give Constructive Criticism, these are the strongest matches in the current practice library.
Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?
- No matter how carefully I word it, my feedback seems to land as me sitting in judgment over them from above
- Every time I raise an issue with someone they get defensive and we end up arguing about whether they’re a good person instead of fixing the actual problem
- Every time I point out what someone did wrong, they get defensive and dig in instead of actually hearing me
- My praise is all vague "nice work, good stuff" while every critique I give is razor-specific
- I dish out plenty of feedback but I’ve never once asked my team to tell me what I’m getting wrong, and I think that’s exactly why they don’t trust that honesty around here is safe
Practices that may help
- Establish shared purpose before delivering critique
Frame critique as help toward a shared goal, not an evaluation from above.
The Feedback Sandwich: Why It Doesn’t Work and What to Do Instead - Make feedback specific and behavioral, not evaluative
Describe what you observed, not what it says about the person.
The Feedback Sandwich: Why It Doesn’t Work and What to Do Instead - Don’t criticize, condemn, or complain
Criticism puts people on the defensive and rarely produces lasting change.
How to Win Friends and Influence People, Made Practical - Make praise as specific as criticism
Vague praise is nearly worthless; name exactly what was good and why.
Radical Candor, Made Practical - Ask for feedback before you give it
Earn the right to challenge by inviting challenge yourself, first.
Radical Candor, Made Practical - Describe behavior, not character
Say what the person did — actions, words — not what that says about who they are.
The SBI Feedback Model, Made Practical - Understand why the sandwich fails before replacing it
The sandwich fails because it sends three conflicting signals at once.
The Feedback Sandwich: Why It Doesn’t Work and What to Do Instead - Feedback: extract the signal, ignore the noise
Seek feedback fast, but use the part that actually tells you how to improve.
Ultralearning: Aggressive, Self-Directed Learning - Invite a response after delivering SBI
Close SBI by asking what the other person makes of it — not with a verdict.
The SBI Feedback Model, Made Practical - Adapt how you deliver feedback to the person’s style
Deliver the same honest feedback in the form the other person can actually hear it.
The Platinum Rule
Related concerns
- How To Give Feedback Without Criticizing
Close SBI by asking what the other person makes of it — not with a verdict.
Invite a response after delivering SBI
- How To Handle A Coworker Who Cant Take Feedback
Describe what you observed, not what it says about the person.
Make feedback specific and behavioral, not evaluative
- How To Receive Criticism
Do a brief values reflection before reading a critical evaluation so you can take in the information rather than defend against it.
Affirm before receiving critical feedback
- Receiving Criticism
Criticism puts people on the defensive and rarely produces lasting change.
Don’t criticize, condemn, or complain
- Soliciting Criticism
Earn the right to challenge by inviting challenge yourself, first.
Ask for feedback before you give it
- When Confirmation Bias Red Team Your Plan
Assign someone the explicit role of finding every way your plan could be wrong or fail.
Red-team your plan with a formal adversarial review
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