Coaching practices for Motivational Interviewing for My Teenager

Describe almost anything you are working through and IX Coach finds the practices whose real-world fit is closest. For Motivational Interviewing for My Teenager, these are the strongest matches in the current practice library.

Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?

  • They tell me what kind of parent or partner they want to be, and it’s miles from how they’re actually living
  • Every time I lay out for someone all the reasons they should change, they just argue back for staying exactly as they are
  • I’m completely unmotivated and I honestly can’t tell whether it’s that deep down I don’t believe I can pull this off, or that I just don’t care about it
  • They say they want to change but they’re clearly half-in, half-out, and I can’t tell whether it’s that the change doesn’t matter enough to them or that they just don’t believe they could actually pull it off.
  • My motivation for this keeps fading because it’s all external

Practices that may help

  1. Motivational Interviewing, Made Practical
    Motivational interviewing (MI) is a collaborative conversation style that strengthens a person’s own motivation for change by drawing out their reasons rather than supplying them. Meta-analyses find small-to-moderate effects across health behaviors — modest on average, but reliably better than confrontational or advice-giving styles, which can backfire.
  2. Develop discrepancy between values and behavior
    Gently hold up the gap between what the person wants and what they’re doing.
    Motivational Interviewing, Made Practical
  3. Evoke change talk instead of supplying it
    Ask questions that lead the person to voice their own reasons for changing.
    Motivational Interviewing, Made Practical
  4. Diagnose whether you are stuck on expectancy or value
    Before trying to motivate yourself, identify which of the two factors is actually low.
    Expectancy-Value Theory: Why You Try (or Don’t)
  5. Scale importance and confidence with the readiness ruler
    Ask “On a 0–10 scale, how ready are you?” — then ask why not lower.
    Motivational Interviewing, Made Practical
  6. Practice self-reevaluation to build a new self-image
    Imagine how you will think and feel about yourself once you have changed — and how you’ll feel if you don’t.
    The Transtheoretical Model of Change, Made Practical
  7. Use autonomy-supportive self-talk
    Coach yourself with choice and rationale, not "shoulds" and self-pressure.
    Self-Determination Theory, Made Usable
  8. Use Plan B: the three-step collaborative conversation
    Empathize with the child’s concern, share yours, and invite them to solve it together.
    Collaborative Problem Solving (Ross Greene)
  9. Ask reflective questions instead of giving answers
    Questions that prompt self-examination invite the person in; directives keep them out.
    Psychological Reactance: Working With the Push-Back Reflex
  10. Locate the autonomous "why"
    Reframe a task until you are doing it from your own values, not external pressure.
    Self-Determination Theory, Made Usable

Related concerns

Describe your situation in your own words to search the complete practice library.

Practice this with IX Coach

Try this practice