Coaching practices for Trust Care Feltman
Describe almost anything you are working through and IX Coach finds the practices whose real-world fit is closest. For Trust Care Feltman, these are the strongest matches in the current practice library.
Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?
- I do genuinely have their back, but I assume they just know it, so I never actually show it
- I’m warm and patient with the people I love but the moment it’s a stranger or someone serving me, that care just switches off
- I won’t hand anyone real responsibility until they’ve completely proven themselves first
- Trust with this person has cracked and I just keep apologizing for "not being trustworthy" in this big vague way
- I realize I know exactly what each person on my team is working on this week but almost nothing about where they’re actually trying to get to in their life
Practices that may help
- Demonstrate care through visible acts in the other person’s interest
Show that your interests and theirs are genuinely aligned — not only when it’s convenient.
The Trust Triangle - The Trust Triangle
Charles Feltman’s Trust Triangle (from The Thin Book of Trust) identifies four distinct assessments that together constitute trust: sincerity (I mean what I say), reliability (I do what I say), competence (I have the ability to do what I say), and care (I have your interests at heart). Trust breaks down when any one of these assessments fails — and repairing trust requires identifying which assessment was damaged. - The concentric-circle extension of ren
Deliberately extend the quality of care you have for those closest to you toward more distant others.
Confucian Self-Cultivation: The Mencius Approach - Extend trust deliberately to invite it
Trust others first, in bounded ways, before they have earned every dimension — it is how trust is built.
The Trust Triangle - Diagnose which trust dimension is broken before trying to repair
Name the specific trust assessment that failed — then address that one, not trust in general.
The Trust Triangle - Learn what each person actually wants from their career and life
Care personally means knowing the goal behind the job — not just what they’re working on, but why.
Caring Personally: The Foundation of Radical Candor - Practice foresight and stewardship
Hold the team’s resources and future in trust — decide for the long game, not just this quarter.
Servant Leadership, Made Practical - Lower your guard to raise the intimacy score
Sharing something real about yourself makes others feel safer sharing something real with you.
The Trust Equation, Made Practical - Create and protect the couple bubble
Agree that you each put the relationship above any third party, including family of origin.
Secure-Functioning Relationships - Tend to yourself before tending to others
Sustainable tend-and-befriend requires that the caregiver’s own basic needs are met — otherwise helping depletes rather than regulates.
Tend-and-Befriend, Made Practical
Related concerns
- How To Gain Trust After Failing To Support My Wife In A Difficult Moment
Name the specific trust assessment that failed — then address that one, not trust in general.
Diagnose which trust dimension is broken before trying to repair
- The Trust Triangle As A Parent
Charles Feltman’s Trust Triangle (from The Thin Book of Trust) identifies four distinct assessments that together constitute trust: sincerity (I mean what I say), reliability (I do what I say), competence (I have the ability to do what I say), and care (I have your interests at heart). Trust breaks down when any one of these assessments fails — and repairing trust requires identifying which assessment was damaged.
- The Trust Triangle For My Teenager
Charles Feltman’s Trust Triangle (from The Thin Book of Trust) identifies four distinct assessments that together constitute trust: sincerity (I mean what I say), reliability (I do what I say), competence (I have the ability to do what I say), and care (I have your interests at heart). Trust breaks down when any one of these assessments fails — and repairing trust requires identifying which assessment was damaged.
- Trust Dimensions Feltman
Charles Feltman’s Trust Triangle (from The Thin Book of Trust) identifies four distinct assessments that together constitute trust: sincerity (I mean what I say), reliability (I do what I say), competence (I have the ability to do what I say), and care (I have your interests at heart). Trust breaks down when any one of these assessments fails — and repairing trust requires identifying which assessment was damaged.
- Trust Triangle Feltman
Charles Feltman’s Trust Triangle (from The Thin Book of Trust) identifies four distinct assessments that together constitute trust: sincerity (I mean what I say), reliability (I do what I say), competence (I have the ability to do what I say), and care (I have your interests at heart). Trust breaks down when any one of these assessments fails — and repairing trust requires identifying which assessment was damaged.
- Care Dimension Of Trust
Show that your interests and theirs are genuinely aligned — not only when it’s convenient.
Demonstrate care through visible acts in the other person’s interest
Describe your situation in your own words to search the complete practice library.