Coaching practices for What Should You Do After You've Raised Your Voice at Your Child

Describe almost anything you are working through and IX Coach finds the practices whose real-world fit is closest. For What Should You Do After You've Raised Your Voice at Your Child, these are the strongest matches in the current practice library.

Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?

  • When my kid acts out I lose it
  • Every conversation with my kid about their behavior turns into me laying down the law and them digging in, and I want a way to actually talk it through together
  • I only ever speak up to my kid when something’s wrong
  • When my kid is melting down I feel trapped between two bad options
  • I keep trying to reason with my kid right in the middle of the meltdown

Practices that may help

  1. Refuse to energize negative behavior
    Give consequences briefly and blandly — no energy, no lecture, no drama.
    The Nurtured Heart Approach (Howard Glasser)
  2. Use Plan B: the three-step collaborative conversation
    Empathize with the child’s concern, share yours, and invite them to solve it together.
    Collaborative Problem Solving (Ross Greene)
  3. Deliver active recognition of ordinary positive moments
    Narrate what the child is doing right in real time, even when it is unremarkable.
    The Nurtured Heart Approach (Howard Glasser)
  4. Use empathy to de-escalate, not to capitulate
    Name the child’s emotional state without agreeing with every demand — empathy and limits can coexist.
    Collaborative Problem Solving (Ross Greene)
  5. Hold Plan B conversations proactively, not reactively
    Solve the problem before the next explosion, when everyone is calm.
    Collaborative Problem Solving (Ross Greene)
  6. Give clear, calm, single instructions
    One specific direction at a time, calmly stated once, is more effective than repeated commands.
    Triple P Parenting (Matthew Sanders)
  7. Labeling emotions in children: the parenting application
    When a child is upset, name their emotion aloud and validate it before attempting to solve or redirect.
    Name It to Tame It: Affect Labeling in Practice
  8. Soften when anger says attack
    When unjustified anger urges attack, gently avoid, withdraw, or take the other person’s side a little.
    Opposite Action: Acting Against the Emotion’s Urge
  9. Take time for training — teach the skill, not just the rule
    Children misbehave partly because they don’t know how to do the right thing — teach the skill when everyone is calm.
    Positive Discipline (Jane Nelsen)
  10. Recognize what is not happening with proactive recognition
    Catch the child not misbehaving and name the success explicitly.
    The Nurtured Heart Approach (Howard Glasser)

Related concerns

Describe your situation in your own words to search the complete practice library.

Practice this with IX Coach

Try this practice