Coaching practices for My Whole Instinct is to Push Pain Away and Grab at Anything That Feels Good and I'm Tired of How Walled Off That Makes Me I Want to Actually Breathe in the Hard Stuff Mine and Other People's Instead of Bracing Against All of it

Describe almost anything you are working through and IX Coach finds the practices whose real-world fit is closest. For My Whole Instinct is to Push Pain Away and Grab at Anything That Feels Good and I'm Tired of How Walled Off That Makes Me I Want to Actually Breathe in the Hard Stuff Mine and Other People's Instead of Bracing Against All of it, these are the strongest matches in the current practice library.

Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?

• My whole instinct is to push pain away and grab at anything that feels good, and I’m tired of how walled-off that makes me
• The moment a hard feeling rises I clamp down against it and brace, trying to push it away
• I’ve been fighting and trying to push away my own pain and it only tightens its grip
• I spend so much energy trying to push down or get rid of what I feel, and it just comes back stronger
• I’m stuck at one of two extremes with hard feelings

Practices that may help

1. Tonglen: sending and taking
   Breathe in suffering (yours and others’); breathe out relief and well-being.
   Lojong: Tibetan Mind Training
2. Expand into difficult feelings rather than contracting away
   When discomfort arrives, consciously make room for it rather than tightening against it.
   Psychological Flexibility, Made Practical
3. Practice tonglen for your own suffering first
   Use your own current pain as the object before extending the practice to others.
   Tonglen: The Tibetan Practice of Taking and Sending
4. Acceptance (willingness)
   Make room for unwanted feelings instead of struggling against them, so they stop running the show.
   Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), Made Practical
5. Mindful awareness of suffering
   Hold painful feelings in balanced awareness — neither suppressing them nor being swept away by them.
   Self-Compassion, Made Practical
6. A — Allow the experience to be as it is
   Let what is present be here, without pushing it away, numbing it, or elaborating it.
   RAIN Meditation: Tara Brach’s Four-Step Practice
7. Relax and release stuck energy
   When emotion grips, consciously relax and let the energy move through instead of clamping down.
   The Untethered Soul, In Practice
8. Acknowledge: name what is hard
   Place a hand on your heart and say, "This is a moment of suffering."
   The Self-Compassion Break
9. Receive what comes with friendliness
   Welcome whatever emerges from the felt sense without judgment or urgency to fix it.
   Focusing and the Felt Sense, Made Practical
10. Welcome experience rather than manage it
    Shift from trying to control or fix your experience to meeting it with open, allowing awareness.
    Non-Dual Awareness, Made Practical

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