Coaching practices for I Keep Acting Against What I Say I Value and Breaking the Small Promises I Make to Myself and Each Time I Lose a Little Face with the One Person I Can Never Get Away From Me and the Gap Between Who I Claim to Be and How I Actually Behave is Eating at My Self Respect

Describe almost anything you are working through and IX Coach finds the practices whose real-world fit is closest. For I Keep Acting Against What I Say I Value and Breaking the Small Promises I Make to Myself and Each Time I Lose a Little Face with the One Person I Can Never Get Away From Me and the Gap Between Who I Claim to Be and How I Actually Behave is Eating at My Self Respect, these are the strongest matches in the current practice library.

Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?

  • I keep acting against what I say I value and breaking the small promises I make to myself, and each time I lose a little face with the one person I can never get away from
  • When the pressure builds in a conversation, I cave on something I actually believe in just to make the discomfort stop
  • I keep swallowing what I actually want and going along to keep the peace, and every time I stay silent against my own wishes it quietly tells me my needs don’t matter
  • I’ve broken so many promises to myself that I don’t even believe me anymore
  • I keep waffling and breaking my own little promises to myself, so there’s no track record to point to

Practices that may help

  1. The practice of personal integrity
    Keep your behavior aligned with your stated values — match your walk to your talk.
    The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem, Made Practical
  2. Stick to Values: act consistently with what actually matters to you
    Before compromising a position, check whether the compromise conflicts with a core value — and hold if it does.
    FAST: DBT’s Skill for Maintaining Self-Respect in Relationships
  3. The practice of self-assertiveness
    Honor your wants, needs, and values by expressing them in the world — appropriately and openly.
    The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem, Made Practical
  4. Build trust with yourself through consistent small commitments
    Each kept promise to yourself reduces the self-doubt that drives shame after future delays.
    Self-Forgiveness and Procrastination
  5. Use decisive action to build, not just express, self-concept clarity
    Make and keep commitments deliberately — each kept commitment is data that builds a clearer self-knowledge over time.
    Self-Concept Clarity, Made Practical
  6. Confidence from keeping promises to yourself
    Reliably showing up builds self-trust independent of how any session goes.
    Strength Training for Confidence
  7. FAST: maintaining self-respect in difficult interactions
    Fair, no Apologies, Stick to values, Truthful — the self-respect compass for high-pressure conversations.
    DBT Interpersonal Effectiveness: Getting What You Need Without Destroying the Relationship
  8. Name and wrestle with your besetting weakness
    Identify the one recurring moral failure and choose a practice that confronts it daily.
    The Eulogy Virtues: Building a Life of Character
  9. Rate your current position in each domain
    Mark on each domain’s bullseye how closely your recent behavior has matched the value — honestly.
    Values Bullseye, Made Practical
  10. Respond to identity threats without self-concept collapse
    When you act against your identity, treat it as a behavior question, not a character verdict.
    Identity Priming, Made Practical

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