Coaching practices for Breathing in Suffering Meditation

Describe almost anything you are working through and IX Coach finds the practices whose real-world fit is closest. For Breathing in Suffering Meditation, these are the strongest matches in the current practice library.

Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?

  • I’ve heard of this breathing-in-the-pain practice but it stays a vague idea in my head
  • My whole instinct is to push pain away and grab at anything that feels good, and I’m tired of how walled-off that makes me
  • When I try to breathe in suffering from a raw, already-shaky place it just pulls me under rather than opening me
  • I’ve been fighting and trying to push away my own pain and it only tightens its grip
  • Someone I love is suffering and there is nothing I can actually do to fix it, and that helplessness is unbearable

Practices that may help

  1. Work with the classical two-breath texture
    Breathe in something hot, dark, and heavy; breathe out something cool, bright, and spacious.
    Tonglen: The Tibetan Practice of Taking and Sending
  2. Tonglen: sending and taking
    Breathe in suffering (yours and others’); breathe out relief and well-being.
    Lojong: Tibetan Mind Training
  3. Prepare for tonglen with a brief equanimity grounding
    Entering tonglen from a grounded, spacious state makes the practice sustainable rather than destabilising.
    Tonglen: The Tibetan Practice of Taking and Sending
  4. Practice tonglen for your own suffering first
    Use your own current pain as the object before extending the practice to others.
    Tonglen: The Tibetan Practice of Taking and Sending
  5. Direct tonglen toward a specific suffering person
    Bring a person who is suffering to mind and breathe in their pain; breathe out whatever would give them relief.
    Tonglen: The Tibetan Practice of Taking and Sending
  6. Investigate resistance to the practice honestly
    The impulse not to breathe in suffering is information about where your self-protective contraction lives.
    Tonglen: The Tibetan Practice of Taking and Sending
  7. Use flash tonglen in the moment of encountering suffering
    A single in-breath of someone’s pain and an out-breath of goodwill is a complete act of tonglen.
    Tonglen: The Tibetan Practice of Taking and Sending
  8. Informal counting — using the practice during ordinary tasks
    Apply breath counting for 10–20 breaths during stressful transitions or idle moments in the day.
    Breath Counting Meditation
  9. Connected circular breathing — the core technique
    Breathe continuously without pauses between inhale and exhale, faster than normal.
    Holotropic Breathwork, Made Practical
  10. Adding sensation to the count
    Pair each count with a specific physical sensation of breath — deepening attention from number to felt experience.
    Breath Counting Meditation

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