Coaching for the challenges people actually bring (page 457)
Start with what is happening in your life. Each concern below opens the closest matches from the IX Coach practice library. Showing 100 / 47301 concerns.
- The Craving Hits and it Feels Like It'll Never Let Up Unless I Give in I've Never Once Just Stayed with the Wanting to See If it Passes on Its Own Because in the Moment it Feels Unbearable
Ride the wave to its peak and down · Locate the urge in your body · Extinguish conditioned cravings through cue exposure without response + 7 more
- The Craving to Pour the Drink Raid the Fridge Send the Message Lands Like it Absolutely Cannot Wait Like the Only Way This Feeling Ever Ends is If I Give in Right Now and I've Never Actually Tested Whether it Would Pass on Its Own If I Just Let it Crest
Urge Surfing: Riding Out the Impulse Without Acting · Ride the wave to its peak and down · Buy time with a brief delay + 7 more
- The Creative Act Rick Rubin S Approach to Making After a Setback
Experiment without attachment to outcome · The Creative Act: Rick Rubin’s Approach to Making · Cultivate awareness as your primary creative tool + 7 more
- The Creative Act Rick Rubin S Approach to Making Before Bed
The Creative Act: Rick Rubin’s Approach to Making · Cultivate awareness as your primary creative tool · Protect solitude and silence as creative inputs + 7 more
- The Creative Act Rick Rubin S Approach to Making on a Budget
The Creative Act: Rick Rubin’s Approach to Making · Cultivate awareness as your primary creative tool · Experiment without attachment to outcome + 7 more
- The Critic in My Head Runs Nonstop but It's All a Blur I Couldn't Actually Tell You What it Says or What Sets it Off Just That I Feel Worse All the Time and Can't Catch it in the Act
Recognizing Shame and Self-Criticism Patterns · Name and externalize the inner critic · Critic journaling — transcript and response + 7 more
- The Curse of Knowledge Why Experts Struggle to Teach After a Loss
The Curse of Knowledge: Why Experts Struggle to Teach · Work backwards from what the learner needs to do · Find a genuine novice to test your explanation on + 7 more
- The Curt Email Just Landed and I'm Already Certain They Did it to Slight Me My Whole Body Has Decided It's Personal in the Space of a Second and I Can Feel Myself About to Fire Back Before I've Given a Single Other Explanation a Chance
Pause before attributing intent · Rumble with the story you’re telling yourself · Generate the charitable explanation + 7 more
- The Daily Examen Reviewing the Day After a Loss
The Daily Examen: Reviewing the Day · Begin with gratitude · Replay the day with honest attention + 7 more
- The Daily Examen Reviewing the Day After a Setback
The Daily Examen: Reviewing the Day · Begin with gratitude · Look honestly at your responses + 7 more
- The Daily Examen Reviewing the Day for My Teenager
The Daily Examen: Reviewing the Day · The daily examen (end-of-day review) · Keep it brief and daily + 7 more
- The Daily Examen Reviewing the Day When Starting Out
The Daily Examen: Reviewing the Day · Keep it brief and daily · Begin with gratitude + 7 more
- The Daily Examen Reviewing the Day with My Partner
The Daily Examen: Reviewing the Day · Keep it brief and daily · Close with a resolve for tomorrow + 7 more
- The Dark Night of the Soul John of the Cross as a Caregiver
The Dark Night of the Soul: John of the Cross · What emerges after the night: greater freedom and union · Understanding the night as purgative rather than punitive + 7 more
- The Dark Night of the Soul John of the Cross When Burned Out
The Dark Night of the Soul: John of the Cross · What emerges after the night: greater freedom and union · Recognizing the dark night versus depression or failure + 7 more
- The Dark Night of the Soul John of the Cross with Friends
The Dark Night of the Soul: John of the Cross · What emerges after the night: greater freedom and union · Understanding the night as purgative rather than punitive + 7 more
- The Day I'm Trying to Get Back on Track is Usually Still a Rough One the Same Kind of Day That Made Me Miss in the First Place and Because I Insist it Has to Be the Full Proper Version or it Doesn't Count I Can't Face it and Just Skip Again
Drop to a minimum on the recovery day · Write a recovery if–then for when you slip · Make the day after a miss non-negotiable + 7 more
- The Day They Died Still Plays in My Head in Jagged Pieces the Phone Call the Room the Moment I Was Told and it Won't Settle Into Something I Can Actually Tell From Start to Finish It's Stuck in the Present Tense Happening to Me Again Every Time
Retell the story of the death and its aftermath · Construct a coherent narrative of the loss · Use specific memories as resources for meaning + 7 more
- The Deadline is Weeks Out So it Feels Like it Doesn't Exist Yet and I Know I'll Only Really Move Once It's Right on Top of Me but by Then It's a Panic and I Wish the Pressure Would Just Arrive Sooner
Shorten the effective delay with interim deadlines · Self-imposed deadlines · Treat 12 weeks as a full year + 7 more
- The Deal is Closed and Fine but I Keep Negotiating in the Dark I Walk Away Never Really Knowing What the Other Side Actually Valued So I Make the Same Blind Moves Every Time and I Want to Finally Learn From One of These What I Missed So the Next One Goes Better
Run a negotiation debrief to learn what value was left on the table · Use a post-settlement settlement to improve a deal after agreement · Share information to unlock value + 7 more
- The Deal is Stuck Because They Swear the Numbers Will Hit and I'm Sure They Won't and Neither of Us Will Budge on Our Forecast I Want to Stop Arguing About Who's Right About the Future and Instead Build a Deal That Just Pays Out According to Whatever Actually Happens
Bridge disagreements with contingent terms · Write contingent contracts when forecasts disagree · Insist on objective criteria + 7 more
- The Demand Withdraw Pattern Breaking the Pursue Retreat Cycle on a Budget
The Demand-Withdraw Pattern: Breaking the Pursue-Retreat Cycle · Excavating the underlying needs on both sides · The Pursuer-Withdrawer Cycle, Explained + 7 more
- The Demand Withdraw Pattern Breaking the Pursue Retreat Cycle with My Partner
The Demand-Withdraw Pattern: Breaking the Pursue-Retreat Cycle · Identifying your role in the cycle · Excavating the underlying needs on both sides + 7 more
- The Dichotomy of Control Epictetus Central Lesson After a Loss
The Dichotomy of Control: Epictetus’ Central Lesson · Sort what is up to you · Identify the single most important lever you actually have + 7 more
- The Dichotomy of Control Epictetus Central Lesson After a Setback
The Dichotomy of Control: Epictetus’ Central Lesson · Sort what is up to you · Identify the single most important lever you actually have + 7 more
- The Dichotomy of Control Epictetus Central Lesson as a Caregiver
The Dichotomy of Control: Epictetus’ Central Lesson · Sort what is up to you · Apply the dichotomy of control to your desires + 7 more
- The Dichotomy of Control Epictetus Central Lesson as a Parent
The Dichotomy of Control: Epictetus’ Central Lesson · Sort what is up to you · Apply the dichotomy of control to your desires + 7 more
- The Dichotomy of Control Epictetus Central Lesson Before Bed
The Dichotomy of Control: Epictetus’ Central Lesson · Sort what is up to you · Apply the dichotomy of control to your desires + 7 more
- The Dichotomy of Control Epictetus Central Lesson When Burned Out
The Dichotomy of Control: Epictetus’ Central Lesson · Sort what is up to you · The dichotomy-of-control check + 7 more
- The Dichotomy of Control Epictetus Central Lesson When Overwhelmed
The Dichotomy of Control: Epictetus’ Central Lesson · Sort what is up to you · Identify the single most important lever you actually have + 7 more
- The Dichotomy of Control Epictetus Central Lesson with Friends
The Dichotomy of Control: Epictetus’ Central Lesson · Sort what is up to you · Apply the dichotomy of control to your desires + 7 more
- The Door in the Face Technique After a Loss
The Door-in-the-Face Technique, Made Practical · Use reciprocal concessions in negotiation · Keep the same person making both requests + 7 more
- The Door in the Face Technique After a Setback
The Door-in-the-Face Technique, Made Practical · Recover from setbacks without quitting the goal · Find the advantage inside the obstacle + 7 more
- The Door in the Face Technique as a Caregiver
The Door-in-the-Face Technique, Made Practical · Keep the same person making both requests · Apply door-in-the-face for prosocial or charitable asks + 7 more
- The Door in the Face Technique as a Parent
The Door-in-the-Face Technique, Made Practical · Cultivate a "yes brain": curiosity, courage, and resilience over reactivity · Use Plan B: the three-step collaborative conversation + 7 more
- The Door in the Face Technique for My Teenager
The Door-in-the-Face Technique, Made Practical · Use Plan B: the three-step collaborative conversation · Recognize and respect the ethical limits of foot-in-the-door + 7 more
- The Door in the Face Technique in a New Job
The Door-in-the-Face Technique, Made Practical · Use the door-in-the-face structure in salary and price negotiations · The Foot-in-the-Door Technique, Made Practical + 7 more
- The Door in the Face Technique on a Budget
The Door-in-the-Face Technique, Made Practical · Apply door-in-the-face for prosocial or charitable asks · Keep the same person making both requests + 7 more
- The Door in the Face Technique When Burned Out
The Door-in-the-Face Technique, Made Practical · Keep the same person making both requests · Recognize and respect the ethical limits of foot-in-the-door + 7 more
- The Door in the Face Technique When Starting Out
The Door-in-the-Face Technique, Made Practical · Open with a large but plausible request · Use the door-in-the-face structure in salary and price negotiations + 7 more
- The Door in the Face Technique with My Partner
The Door-in-the-Face Technique, Made Practical · Lead with your eyes — use the face as a regulator · Eyes-open intimacy: contact without merger + 7 more
- The Door in the Face Technique with My Team
The Door-in-the-Face Technique, Made Practical · Keep the same person making both requests · Use the Johari Window in team settings + 7 more
- The Downside of Caving is Always So Vague and Far Off That in the Moment it Never Weighs Anything I Keep Breaking the Same Promise to Myself Because Nothing Real is on the Line and I Think I Need an Actual Cost I'd Feel Right Now to Make it Stick
Use price pacts · Commitment contracts with real stakes · Attach a real consequence to misses + 7 more
- The Dread is This Big Shapeless Thing It'll Go Badly I'll Be a Mess and I Can't Get a Grip on it Because I've Never Pinned Down the One Exact Thing I'm Actually Predicting Will Happen
Identifying the Belief to Test · Define the worst case in specifics · Decatastrophize the worst case + 7 more
- The Dream Big Chase the Upside Pep Talks Everyone Gives Me Just Make Me More Anxious Not Fired Up and I Can't Figure Out Why the Framing That Lights Other People Up Leaves Me Cold or What Actually Does Move Me in This Part of My Life
Identify your dominant regulatory focus in a given domain · Mental contrasting (WOOP) · Build expectancy through mastery experiences, not just affirmations + 7 more
- The Dreyfus Model Five Stages From Novice to Expert After a Loss
The Dreyfus Model: Five Stages from Novice to Expert · Allow yourself to be emotionally invested in outcomes at the competent stage · At the expert stage, use deliberate reflection to continue growing + 7 more
- The Dreyfus Model Five Stages From Novice to Expert as a Caregiver
The Dreyfus Model: Five Stages from Novice to Expert · Allow yourself to be emotionally invested in outcomes at the competent stage · At the expert stage, use deliberate reflection to continue growing + 7 more
- The Dreyfus Model Five Stages From Novice to Expert in a New Job
The Dreyfus Model: Five Stages from Novice to Expert · At the expert stage, use deliberate reflection to continue growing · Follow explicit rules and procedures without improvisation at the novice stage + 7 more
- The Dreyfus Model Five Stages From Novice to Expert When Starting Out
The Dreyfus Model: Five Stages from Novice to Expert · Follow explicit rules and procedures without improvisation at the novice stage · At the expert stage, use deliberate reflection to continue growing + 7 more
- The Dreyfus Model Five Stages From Novice to Expert with My Partner
The Dreyfus Model: Five Stages from Novice to Expert · At the expert stage, use deliberate reflection to continue growing · Allow yourself to be emotionally invested in outcomes at the competent stage + 7 more
- The Early Weeks Felt So Easy That I'm Tempted to Pile on More Weight and More Distance at Once but I Don't Want to Overdo it and End Up with a Tendon Injury So I Need to Know How to Ramp Up Without Pushing Too Fast
Progressive ruck march load/volume programming · Apply the 10% rule to limit weekly load increases · Use conversational pace to build exercise tolerance safely + 7 more
- The Eisenhower Matrix for Teams in a New Job
The Eisenhower Matrix for Teams · The Eisenhower Matrix, Made Practical · The Eisenhower Matrix and Delegation + 7 more
- The Enchiridion as a Handbook in a New Job
The Enchiridion, as a Handbook · Sort what is up to you · Use genius mapping in onboarding + 7 more
- The Endless Narration About Me What I Need How I'm Doing What's Next Never Lets Up and What I'm Really After is Some Quiet Practice Where Even for a Few Minutes the Hard Line Around Me Softens and I Feel Part of Something Larger
Contemplation, prayer, or meditation toward the larger · Quieting the commentary track · Resting in the gap between thoughts + 7 more
- The Escape is One Tap Away and So Frictionless That I'm Three Videos Deep Before I Even Realize I Caved There's No Moment of Choice Just a Reflex and I Want the Slip to at Least Cost Me a Little Effort So I'd Have a Chance to Catch Myself
Use effort pacts · Add friction to unwanted behaviors · Design defaults so the cheap reward is not one tap away + 7 more
- The Eulogy Virtues Building a Life of Character After a Loss
The Eulogy Virtues: Building a Life of Character · Choose a character role model and study their biography · Write your own eulogy first + 7 more
- The Eulogy Virtues Building a Life of Character Before Bed
The Eulogy Virtues: Building a Life of Character · Write your own eulogy first · Choose a character role model and study their biography + 7 more
- The Eulogy Virtues Building a Life of Character with Friends
The Eulogy Virtues: Building a Life of Character · Choose a character role model and study their biography · Write your own eulogy first + 7 more
- The Eulogy Virtues Building a Life of Character with My Team
The Eulogy Virtues: Building a Life of Character · Choose a character role model and study their biography · Write your own eulogy first + 7 more
- The Expertise Reversal Effect When Help Becomes Harmful After a Loss
The Expertise Reversal Effect: When Help Becomes Harmful · Assess expertise level before deciding how much guidance to provide · Remove explanations the learner has already internalized + 7 more
- The Expertise Reversal Effect When Help Becomes Harmful After a Setback
The Expertise Reversal Effect: When Help Becomes Harmful · Assess expertise level before deciding how much guidance to provide · Remove explanations the learner has already internalized + 7 more
- The Expertise Reversal Effect When Help Becomes Harmful as a Parent
The Expertise Reversal Effect: When Help Becomes Harmful · Assess expertise level before deciding how much guidance to provide · Remove explanations the learner has already internalized + 7 more
- The Expertise Reversal Effect When Help Becomes Harmful Before Bed
The Expertise Reversal Effect: When Help Becomes Harmful · Assess expertise level before deciding how much guidance to provide · Remove explanations the learner has already internalized + 7 more
- The Expertise Reversal Effect When Help Becomes Harmful with Friends
The Expertise Reversal Effect: When Help Becomes Harmful · Assess expertise level before deciding how much guidance to provide · Remove explanations the learner has already internalized + 7 more
- The Expertise Reversal Effect When Help Becomes Harmful with My Partner
The Expertise Reversal Effect: When Help Becomes Harmful · Assess expertise level before deciding how much guidance to provide · Remove explanations the learner has already internalized + 7 more
- The Fear Feels Like One Solid Wall I Either Climb All at Once or Not at All So I Keep Not at All and I Can't See Any First Step Small Enough That I'd Actually Be Willing to Take it
Build an anxiety hierarchy · Build an exposure hierarchy · Build a fear hierarchy + 7 more
- The Fear Ladder Graded Exposure Made Practical Before Bed
The Fear Ladder: Graded Exposure Made Practical · Build an exposure hierarchy · Build an anxiety hierarchy + 7 more
- The Fear Ladder Graded Exposure Made Practical with Friends
The Fear Ladder: Graded Exposure Made Practical · Build an anxiety hierarchy · Build an exposure hierarchy + 7 more
- The Fear of Doing This Feels Enormous and Permanent Right Now Like I'd Never Recover From the Embarrassment or the Discomfort but If I'm Honest Most Things That Terrified Me This Much Last Year I Can Barely Even Remember Today
Separate the regret you’ll keep from the fear you’ll forget · Run the "did it matter?" check 24 hours later · Build an exposure hierarchy + 7 more
- The Fear of Dying Creeps Up on Me at Night and I Either Spiral or Shove it Down Never Actually Looking at it and I Sense It's Quietly Steering Choices I Make in the Daylight but I've Never Let Myself Examine Exactly What it is I'm So Afraid of
Examining the fear of death philosophically · Fear-setting (define, prevent, repair) · Fear-setting — define the downside before deciding + 7 more
- The Fear Tells Me to Avoid and the Hurt Tells Me to Lash Out and Every Time I Obey the Urge it Just Feeds the Feeling Bigger I Half Suspect the Emotion is Way Out of Proportion to What's Actually True but I Keep Acting it Out Anyway
Check the facts and opposite action · Check the facts first · Opposite action + 7 more
- The Feeling is So Completely on Top of Me That I and the Panic Are the Same Thing Right Now I Can't Get Even an Inch of Space From it and I Need Some Way to Step Back and Watch it Happen Instead of Being Swallowed by it
Notice the noticer: find the observing awareness · Know the panic arc before the next attack · Third-person emotion labeling for self-distancing + 7 more
- The Feeling That I'm About to Be Exposed is So Strong it Just Registers as Fact I Feel Incompetent Therefore I Must Be and the Intensity of it Drowns Out Anything My Actual Track Record Would Say Back
Separate feelings from facts · Emotional reasoning · Name the imposter pattern + 7 more
- The Few Times I've Been Swept Up in Something Huge in a Crowd a Roaring Stadium a Packed Concert Where Everyone Goes Still at Once I Felt This Rush of Belonging I Almost Never Get Otherwise and I Realize I Experience Nearly All My Wonder Alone and I'm Hungry to Feel it Together with People
Seek awe in collective rituals and shared experience · Use awe to reconnect with something larger than yourself · Sharing awe with others + 7 more
- The Feynman Technique Step by Step After a Loss
The Feynman Technique, Step by Step · Run the loop until it is smooth · Go back to the source and relearn the gap + 7 more
- The Feynman Technique Step by Step After a Setback
The Feynman Technique, Step by Step · Run the loop until it is smooth · Go back to the source and relearn the gap + 7 more
- The Feynman Technique Step by Step in a New Job
The Feynman Technique, Step by Step · Run the loop until it is smooth · Teach it to a real person + 7 more
- The Feynman Technique Step by Step with My Partner
The Feynman Technique, Step by Step · Teach it to a real person · Run the loop until it is smooth + 7 more
- The Finish Line for This Goal is Three Months Out and it Feels So Far Away That None of My Weeks Feel Like They Matter I Want Closer Checkpoints I Can Actually Reach and Feel Myself Gaining on Not One Distant Target
Break the WIG into 30-day milestones · Stack proximal milestones beneath a stretch target · Set midpoint milestones to break the middle slump + 7 more
- The First Decent Idea Shows Up and I Grab it and Call it Done but It's Nagging at Me That It's the Obvious One the Thing Anyone Would Think of and I Suspect the Better Idea is Sitting Just Past it If I Didn't Stop So Soon
The obvious veto: reject the first three ideas before keeping any · Go for quantity first · Ideate — generate options before judging + 7 more
- The First Explanation That Fits Locks in for Me and Then I Stop Looking Reading Everything Afterward as Proof I Was Right I Want to Force Myself to Hold a Few Other Accounts Before I Commit to the One That Came First
Systematic alternatives: generate three more explanations before deciding · Hold multiple maps simultaneously · Consider the opposite + 7 more
- The First Stretch Always Feels Like Grinding Uphill So I Bail Thinking It's Just Not Happening Today but I Quit Right Before the Turn and I Never Give it the Long Enough Runway for the Effort to Finally Tip Into Easy
Protect the ramp-up time · Push through the plateau · Training discomfort tolerance + 7 more
- The First Thing I Do Awake is Grab My Phone and by the Time I'm Out of Bed the Inbox and the Headlines Have Already Set My Mood for Me I'm Reacting to the Day Before I've Even Had a Single Quiet Minute That's Actually Mine
Silence (meditation or stillness) · Do not check your phone until you are dressed and ready · Protect the first hour of the day as notification-free + 7 more
- The First Thing I Do Before I'm Even Fully Awake is Grab My Phone and Within Seconds I'm Flooded with Everyone Else's News and Emergencies by the Time I Get Up My Head is Already Full of Other People's Noise and I Never Had a Clear Minute That Was Mine
Build a technology-free morning buffer · Do not check your phone until you are dressed and ready · Protect the first hour of the day as notification-free + 7 more
- The First Thing I Do Before I'm Even Out of Bed is Grab My Phone and by the Time I'm Up My Whole Morning is Already Hijacked by Other People's Emergencies the Day's Agenda Gets Written by My Inbox Before I Get a Say in it
Protect the first hour of the day as notification-free · Protect the first 30 minutes from screens · Set your three outcomes as the first act of the workday + 7 more
- The First Thing I Do Before I'm Even Out of Bed is Grab My Phone and Start Scrolling and by the Time I Look Up My Sharpest Clearest Hour of the Day is Gone and My Mood's Already Soured by Everyone Else's Feeds
Reserve social media for after 10 AM · Do not check your phone until you are dressed and ready · Build a technology-free morning buffer + 7 more
- The First Thing I Do Before My Eyes Are Even Fully Open is Grab My Phone and Within a Minute I'm Flooded with Everyone Else's News and Bad Takes and the Whole Rest of My Morning Feels Reactive and Behind Before I've Even Gotten Up
Do not check your phone until you are dressed and ready · Build a technology-free morning buffer · Protect the first 30 minutes from screens + 7 more
- The First Thing I See Every Time I Unlock is a Wall of Icons Begging to Be Opened and I Land in a Feed Before I Even Remember Why I Picked the Phone Up I Want My Home Screen to Hold Only the Things I Actually Use to Get Something Done
Redesign your home screen as a tool, not a feed · Remove all social and news triggers from your home screen · Remove social and entertainment app icons from the home screen + 7 more
- The Five Dysfunctions of a Team After a Setback
The Five Dysfunctions of a Team, Made Practical · Use regular team health checks to surface dysfunction early · Align around collective results, not individual status + 7 more
- The Five Dysfunctions of a Team When Starting Out
The Five Dysfunctions of a Team, Made Practical · Use regular team health checks to surface dysfunction early · Align around collective results, not individual status + 7 more
- The Fluency Illusion Why Easy Reading Fools You Into Thinking You Ve Learned After a Loss
The Fluency Illusion: Why Easy Reading Fools You Into Thinking You’ve Learned · Beware illusions of knowing · Trusting performance data over feeling + 7 more
- The Foot in the Door Technique After a Loss
The Foot-in-the-Door Technique, Made Practical · The Door-in-the-Face Technique, Made Practical · Recognize and respect the ethical limits of foot-in-the-door + 7 more
- The Foot in the Door Technique After a Setback
The Foot-in-the-Door Technique, Made Practical · The Door-in-the-Face Technique, Made Practical · Keep the second request related to the first + 7 more
- The Foot in the Door Technique as a Caregiver
The Foot-in-the-Door Technique, Made Practical · Recognize and respect the ethical limits of foot-in-the-door · Keep the second request related to the first + 7 more
- The Foot in the Door Technique in a New Job
The Foot-in-the-Door Technique, Made Practical · Recognize and respect the ethical limits of foot-in-the-door · Keep the second request related to the first + 7 more
- The Foot in the Door Technique with My Partner
The Foot-in-the-Door Technique, Made Practical · Keep the second request related to the first · Recognize and respect the ethical limits of foot-in-the-door + 7 more
- The Forgetting Curve How Memory Decays and How to Fight it After a Loss
The Forgetting Curve: How Memory Decays and How to Fight It · Over-learn until retrieval is fluent, then stop · Review new material within 24 hours of learning it + 7 more
- The Forgetting Curve How Memory Decays and How to Fight it Before Bed
The Forgetting Curve: How Memory Decays and How to Fight It · Review new material within 24 hours of learning it · Schedule learning before sleep to leverage overnight consolidation + 7 more
- The Four Stages of Psychological Safety After a Loss
The Four Stages of Psychological Safety · Respond immediately and visibly to safety violations · Run brief after-action reviews without blame + 7 more
- The Four Stages of Psychological Safety as a Parent
The Four Stages of Psychological Safety · Diagnose which safety stage your team is currently in · Respond immediately and visibly to safety violations + 7 more
Or describe your concern in your own words.