Asking whether an old frame still fits this moment
When you notice yourself reaching for a belief you were raised with, ask whether it fits the situation in front of you, and write what the situation actually needs.
Perché funziona
Keller’s (2008) view, as reported by Mallery and Mallery (2022), is that maturity may lie in the flexible use of several styles as the context calls for them, rather than in always using the highest one. On this view a lower style is less mature only when it is used in a non-adaptive context or when the person has no access to other styles. Asking the question makes the fit visible in the moment instead of leaving it to habit.
Come farlo
- Notice the moment you reach for an old certainty, such as “that’s just how it is” or “we don’t do that”.
- Name the situation in one sentence, without the frame’s label.
- Ask what this situation needs from you that the old frame does not give.
- Write what you would do if you were not trying to stay consistent with who you were.
- Choose one small action that fits the situation, and note how it felt afterward.
Prove scientifiche
The flexibility view is Keller’s, reported secondhand in Mallery and Mallery (2022). The in-the-moment check is an inference from it and has not been tested. (mechanistic)
Keller’s own work is not cited here because its text was not read. The claim rests on Mallery and Mallery’s summary of it. Fowler (1974), cited from its abstract, asks readers to treat the stage descriptions as provisional and subject to revision.
Fonti
- Mallery, S. T., & Mallery, P. (2022). Centers of value and the quest for meaning in faith development: A measurement approach. Frontiers in Psychology, 13, 975160.
- Fowler, J. W. (1974). Toward a developmental perspective on faith. Religious Education, 69(2), 207–219.
Errore comune
Using the question to decide that an old frame is wrong and should be dropped. The check asks whether the frame fits this situation, and a frame that fits one moment can still be the right one in another.
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Altre pratiche per James Fowler’s Stages of Faith, Made Practical
- Faith timeline: mapping what you trusted at each age
Draw your life as one line and mark, age by age, what you trusted to make sense of things and where that trust changed hands.
- Centers of value: answering the four questions in writing
Write down what you give your life to, who you are committed to in life and death, what you hope for, and who you share your most sacred hopes with.
- Master stories: naming the story you were handed about how life works
Write the story you live by, and name who or what you picture holding the final say when things go wrong.
- Retelling one disagreement from the other side
Write your position on one unsettled disagreement, then write theirs well enough that they would recognise it as their own.
- Mapping the circle of people you feel close to
List the people you feel most responsible to and close to, and mark which of them hold a belief or value that differs from yours.
- Holding two frames at once without picking a winner
Name the two ways of making sense of one question that both feel partly true right now, and write what each one still gets right.
- Talking with someone about a conviction you do not share
Ask someone who holds a conviction you do not share what it protects for them, repeat their answer back until they say it is right, then say what you still hold.
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- Spiral Dynamics, Reso Pratico
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- The Self-Transforming Mind: Kegan’s Fifth Order, Made Practical
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- The Construct-Aware and Unitive Stages of Adult Development
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- Ken Wilber’s Integral Theory (AQAL), Made Practical
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