Assertiveness Training and the Conflict Resolution Model: 10 Evidence-Based Coaching Practices
Describe almost anything you are working through and IX Coach finds the practices whose real-world fit is closest. For Assertiveness Training and the Conflict Resolution Model, these are the strongest matches in the current practice library.
Practices that may help
- Assertiveness Training, Made Practical
Assertiveness training is a set of learnable skills — using I-statements, the broken-record technique, fogging, and saying no without over-justifying — that let you express needs and limits directly without aggression or passivity. It comes out of behavior therapy and social-skills training and has a genuine clinical basis, taught for decades in therapeutic settings. - The Five Conflict-Resolution Styles
The Thomas-Kilmann model maps conflict behavior on two axes — how much you assert your own needs and how much you cooperate with the other’s — yielding five styles: competing, accommodating, avoiding, compromising, and collaborating. None is "best": each fits certain situations, and skill lies in choosing deliberately rather than defaulting to the one style you always reach for. The model is a widely used framework and instrument, not an outcome-tested intervention. - Competing (assertive, uncooperative)
Pursue your own position firmly when speed, principle, or stakes outweigh the relationship cost.
The Five Conflict-Resolution Styles - FAST: maintaining self-respect in difficult interactions
Fair, no Apologies, Stick to values, Truthful — the self-respect compass for high-pressure conversations.
DBT Interpersonal Effectiveness: Getting What You Need Without Destroying the Relationship - Use Competing when speed or safety matters more than buy-in
Competing — high assertive, low cooperative — is appropriate when the decision is urgent, high-stakes, and not open for debate.
The Thomas–Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument (TKI) - Choose your style deliberately
The real skill isn’t a favorite style — it’s matching the style to the situation instead of defaulting.
The Five Conflict-Resolution Styles - Transform the relationship, not just the issue
Use each conflict as an opportunity to raise the quality of the relationship itself.
The Third Alternative, Made Practical - Recognize when to shift modes mid-conflict
The mode that’s right at the start of a conversation may not be right ten minutes in.
The Thomas–Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument (TKI) - Use Collaborating when the relationship and the solution both matter
Collaborating — high assertive, high cooperative — finds a solution that genuinely works for both parties, but it takes time.
The Thomas–Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument (TKI) - DEAR MAN for interpersonal effectiveness
A structured script — Describe, Express, Assert, Reinforce, Mindful, Appear confident, Negotiate — for asking and saying no.
Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) Skills, Made Practical
Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?
- Something’s genuinely wrong here and there’s no time to coax everyone to a comfortable yes
- I walk away from conflicts having caved again
- There’s a real call that has to be made right now with no time to build consensus, and I keep softening it and hedging to keep everyone happy
- I handle every disagreement the same way
- We solve the immediate thing but the same ugly dynamic underneath stays exactly the same, so the next disagreement plays out identically
Related concerns
- Different Styles Of Conflict Resolution
The Thomas-Kilmann model maps conflict behavior on two axes — how much you assert your own needs and how much you cooperate with the other’s — yielding five styles: competing, accommodating, avoiding, compromising, and collaborating. None is "best": each fits certain situations, and skill lies in choosing deliberately rather than defaulting to the one style you always reach for. The model is a widely used framework and instrument, not an outcome-tested intervention.
- Five Levels Of Conflict
The Thomas-Kilmann model maps conflict behavior on two axes — how much you assert your own needs and how much you cooperate with the other’s — yielding five styles: competing, accommodating, avoiding, compromising, and collaborating. None is "best": each fits certain situations, and skill lies in choosing deliberately rather than defaulting to the one style you always reach for. The model is a widely used framework and instrument, not an outcome-tested intervention.
- The Ivy Lee Method During Conflict
The Ivy Lee Method is a simple daily planning routine: each evening, list your six most important tasks for tomorrow in priority order, then work through them sequentially without switching. It is a practitioner system with a century-old origin story and no formal controlled trials, but it operationalizes well-supported principles — prioritization, sequencing, and single-task focus — in a low-overhead format.
- 5 Conflict Management Styles
The Thomas-Kilmann model maps conflict behavior on two axes — how much you assert your own needs and how much you cooperate with the other’s — yielding five styles: competing, accommodating, avoiding, compromising, and collaborating. None is "best": each fits certain situations, and skill lies in choosing deliberately rather than defaulting to the one style you always reach for. The model is a widely used framework and instrument, not an outcome-tested intervention.
- 5 Conflict Resolution Strategies Examples
The Thomas-Kilmann model maps conflict behavior on two axes — how much you assert your own needs and how much you cooperate with the other’s — yielding five styles: competing, accommodating, avoiding, compromising, and collaborating. None is "best": each fits certain situations, and skill lies in choosing deliberately rather than defaulting to the one style you always reach for. The model is a widely used framework and instrument, not an outcome-tested intervention.
- Accommodating Conflict Management Style
Yield to the other’s needs when the issue matters far more to them than to you.
Accommodating (cooperative, unassertive)
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