Coaching practices for Dignity Therapy

Describe almost anything you are working through and IX Coach finds the practices whose real-world fit is closest. For Dignity Therapy, these are the strongest matches in the current practice library.

Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?

• I walk away from conflicts having caved again
• I "won" the argument — I got exactly what I was after — but I walked away with a sour feeling, because I got it by needling them and bending the truth, and I’m realizing whether I got my way isn’t actually the question I should be asking; it’s whether I can respect how I behaved to get it.
• When the pressure builds in a conversation, I cave on something I actually believe in just to make the discomfort stop
• I keep acting against what I say I value and breaking the small promises I make to myself, and each time I lose a little face with the one person I can never get away from
• Going into this hard conversation I want it all at once

Practices that may help

1. FAST: DBT’s Skill for Maintaining Self-Respect in Relationships
   FAST — Fair, Apologies (no unnecessary ones), Stick to values, Truthful — is a DBT interpersonal effectiveness skill developed by Marsha Linehan for maintaining self-respect in relationships. While DEAR MAN aims for getting what you need and GIVE aims for relationship health, FAST targets the internal cost: whether you feel like yourself and respect yourself after the interaction.
2. FAST: maintaining self-respect in difficult interactions
   Fair, no Apologies, Stick to values, Truthful — the self-respect compass for high-pressure conversations.
   DBT Interpersonal Effectiveness: Getting What You Need Without Destroying the Relationship
3. Use self-respect as the outcome measure — not just whether you got what you wanted
   After any difficult interaction, ask: "Do I respect myself for how I showed up?" — not just "did I win?"
   FAST: DBT’s Skill for Maintaining Self-Respect in Relationships
4. Stick to Values: act consistently with what actually matters to you
   Before compromising a position, check whether the compromise conflicts with a core value — and hold if it does.
   FAST: DBT’s Skill for Maintaining Self-Respect in Relationships
5. The practice of personal integrity
   Keep your behavior aligned with your stated values — match your walk to your talk.
   The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem, Made Practical
6. Balance FAST with DEAR MAN when the relationship and the goal are both at stake
   Use DEAR MAN for what you want, GIVE for the relationship, and FAST for yourself — and know which to weight when they conflict.
   FAST: DBT’s Skill for Maintaining Self-Respect in Relationships
7. DEAR MAN for interpersonal effectiveness
   A structured script — Describe, Express, Assert, Reinforce, Mindful, Appear confident, Negotiate — for asking and saying no.
   Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) Skills, Made Practical
8. Be Fair: include yourself in the fairness you extend to others
   Apply the same standards of fairness to yourself that you would to someone you respect.
   FAST: DBT’s Skill for Maintaining Self-Respect in Relationships
9. Use the right level of validation for the situation
   Match your validation to what is actually true — surface agreement, emotional acknowledgment, or deep understanding.
   GIVE: DBT’s Skill for Preserving Relationships During Difficult Conversations
10. Compassion-Focused Therapy: Calming the Inner Critic
    Compassion-Focused Therapy (CFT), developed by Paul Gilbert, targets shame and self-criticism by training a compassionate inner voice to replace the punitive self-critic. It draws on evolutionary psychology and affective neuroscience — specifically, the finding that different emotional systems (threat, drive, soothing) have distinct neurobiological profiles. A growing body of RCT evidence supports CFT for shame-based difficulties, self-criticism, and depression, though the evidence base is smaller than for CBT.

Describe your situation in your own words to search the complete practice library.