Coaching practices for Two Sided Interests

Describe almost anything you are working through and IX Coach finds the practices whose real-world fit is closest. For Two Sided Interests, these are the strongest matches in the current practice library.

Does this sound like the set of challenges you might be facing?

  • I’m walking into this assuming it’s a fixed pie where their win is my loss, and I’ve only ever thought through my own side
  • We’re treating this like a fight when actually we both want the same outcome
  • The numbers actually work and yet they still won’t budge, and I keep sweetening the offer to no effect
  • We’re stuck head-to-head over a single number, both digging in on what we’re demanding, and I keep sensing that if I understood what’s actually driving their number
  • We’re both clamped onto our numbers and just sliding them toward the middle, and it feels like a tug-of-war with no give

Practices that may help

  1. Map interests for both sides before generating solutions
    Write down both parties’ known and inferred interests before proposing anything — the map reveals trades that no single position could.
    Interests vs. Positions: The Core of Integrative Negotiation
  2. Interests vs. Positions: The Core of Integrative Negotiation
    A position is what someone says they want ("I need $80,000"); an interest is why they want it ("I need to cover my expenses and feel valued"). Fisher and Ury’s insight in Getting to Yes is that positions in direct conflict often mask compatible interests — and that negotiating on interests rather than positions is the main lever for creating agreements that satisfy both parties rather than splitting the difference.
  3. Identify compatible interests for joint gain
    When both sides care about the same thing — quality, reputation, timing — agreements that serve that shared interest outperform splits.
    Interests vs. Positions: The Core of Integrative Negotiation
  4. Distinguish substantive, procedural, and psychological interests
    The interest behind a position is often not about the money or the terms — it may be about face, fairness, or control.
    Interests vs. Positions: The Core of Integrative Negotiation
  5. Probe for interests, not positions
    Ask why the other side wants what they say they want before responding to what they say.
    Expanding the Pie: Negotiation Beyond Splitting the Difference
  6. Focus on interests, not positions
    Dig beneath what each side demands to why they want it — the interest, not the stance.
    Getting to Yes: Principled Negotiation
  7. Focus on interests, not positions
    Ask why a position is taken — the underlying interest is almost always more negotiable than the stated demand.
    Principled Negotiation, Made Practical
  8. Ask "why" before proposing any solution
    Understand the interest driving a position before generating any solution — solutions invented before interests are understood usually solve the wrong problem.
    Interests vs. Positions: The Core of Integrative Negotiation
  9. Trade across issues where each side has different priorities
    Give the counterpart what they care most about; get what you care most about — logrolling is only possible when interests differ.
    Interests vs. Positions: The Core of Integrative Negotiation
  10. Share information to unlock value
    Reveal interests (not your bottom line) so both sides can find the better deal.
    Win-Win Thinking: Expanding the Pie

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