Coaching für die Herausforderungen, die Menschen wirklich mitbringen (page 73)

Process Goals, Made Practical · Design process goals that are specific, observable, and within your control · Build a three-level goal hierarchy + 7 more

Maintain a belief-tracking log with timestamps · The positive data log for core belief repair · Reviewing the Results and Extracting the Learning + 7 more

Three-goals prioritization: objective, relationship, or self-respect? · Competing (assertive, uncooperative) · Build a shared repair vocabulary + 7 more

Cognitive Defusion (ACT), Made Practical · Spot defusion moments in ordinary daily reactions · Witnessing thoughts — observing without being them + 7 more

Process Goals, Made Practical · Switch to process-only focus when competition pressure peaks · Use a process goal as an in-performance attention anchor + 7 more

Cognitive Defusion (ACT), Made Practical · Defuse from the thoughts that rule your behavior · Defusion from Anxious Thoughts + 7 more

Procrastination as Emotion Regulation · Cognitively reappraise the task to reduce its emotional charge · Build tolerance for task-related discomfort + 7 more

Update the map from real feedback · Update your view out loud when the evidence warrants it · Ensure the first commitment feels freely chosen + 7 more

Detached mindfulness: observe thoughts without engaging · Mindfulness and Wise Mind · Anchor attention to the present moment deliberately + 7 more

Productive Disagreement, Made Practical · Disagree with your manager constructively · Map what you actually agree on before diving into the disagreement + 7 more

Restructure the provocative appraisal · Apply self-compassion when restructuring gets harsh · Cognitive Restructuring: The CBT Method for Changing Unhelpful Thoughts + 7 more

Productive Disagreement, Made Practical · Map what you actually agree on before diving into the disagreement · Engage in productive ideological conflict + 7 more

Build a coherent narrative of what happened · Re-Authoring the Alternative Story · Retell the story of the death and its aftermath + 7 more

Productive Disagreement, Made Practical · Map what you actually agree on before diving into the disagreement · Engage in productive ideological conflict + 7 more

Use cold water immersion strategically, not habitually · Cold Exposure, Without the Hype · Cold Exposure as Deliberate Discomfort Training + 7 more

Progressive Muscle Relaxation, Made Practical · Tension-release contrast (the core tense-and-release cycle) · The release-only shortcut + 7 more

Use family meetings to solve problems together · Build a culture of discipline, not a disciplinarian culture · Positive Discipline (Jane Nelsen) + 7 more

Progressive relaxation: release physical tension systematically · Progressive Muscle Relaxation, Made Practical · Tension-release contrast (the core tense-and-release cycle) + 7 more

Progressive Muscle Relaxation, Made Practical · Progressive relaxation: release physical tension systematically · Tension-release contrast (the core tense-and-release cycle) + 7 more

Seek awe in collective rituals and shared experience · Use awe to reconnect with something larger than yourself · Sharing awe with others + 7 more

Progressive Overload · Understand all the levers of progressive overload beyond just adding weight · Pair overload with specificity to the movement you want to improve + 7 more

Ask 'What am I missing?' before major decisions · Stay inside for high-stakes, irreversible decisions · Schedule deliberate edge practice + 7 more

Progressive Overload · Understand all the levers of progressive overload beyond just adding weight · Apply the 10% rule to limit weekly load increases + 7 more

Use commitment devices to make future behavior harder to avoid · Commitment Contracts, Made Practical · Disagree and commit — reduce the decision drag of endless debate + 7 more

Progressive Overload · Understand all the levers of progressive overload beyond just adding weight · Learn to recognize your challenge vs. threat physiological state + 7 more

Commitment Contracts, Made Practical · Detach from outcomes and focus only on what you control · Add the reserve clause: "fate permitting" + 7 more

Progressive Summarization, Made Practical · Layer three: write a brief executive summary · Know when not to process: most notes are fine as-is + 7 more

Make a small public commitment that locks in the identity · Use decisive action to build, not just express, self-concept clarity · Commitment Contracts, Made Practical + 7 more

Progressive Summarization, Made Practical · Summarize to help the speaker hear themselves · Separate the person from the problem + 7 more

Close the loop with regular, specific feedback · Use commitment devices to make future behavior harder to avoid · Use feedforward to align team members on goals before projects begin + 7 more

Precommitment Devices (Ulysses Contracts) · Use commitment devices to make future behavior harder to avoid · Commitment Contracts, Made Practical + 7 more

Recover promotion-focus motivation through approach-reminders after setbacks · Recover from setbacks without quitting the goal · Identifying the turning points that shaped you + 7 more

Connect daily work to a larger stake in the world · Cultivate commitment by finding meaningful stakes in your current work · Psychological Hardiness, Made Practical + 7 more

Prosocial Spending: Why Giving Boosts Happiness · Allocate part of your values budget to others · Give in ways that strengthen social connection + 7 more

Schedule commitment renewal to prevent drift · Commitment Contracts, Made Practical · Close the loop: check values-alignment after acting + 7 more

Add the reserve clause: "fate permitting" · Settling on purpose · Anatta as the basis for interconnection + 7 more

Prosocial Spending: Why Giving Boosts Happiness · Allocate part of your values budget to others · Give proportionally to stay in a state of abundance + 7 more

Test your actions against the common good · The seventh-generation test for decisions · Make decisions through debate, not declaration + 7 more

Psychological Flexibility, Made Practical · Treat flexibility as an ongoing practice, not a state to achieve · Gauge your current flexibility level + 7 more

Contemplation opening to universal compassion · Bring contemplative attention to ordinary moments · The Perennial Philosophy, Made Practical + 7 more

Psychological Flexibility, Made Practical · Choose your style deliberately · Gauge your current flexibility level + 7 more

Psychological Flexibility, Made Practical · Gauge your current flexibility level · Treat flexibility as an ongoing practice, not a state to achieve + 7 more

Psychological Hardiness, Made Practical · Cultivate commitment by finding meaningful stakes in your current work · Practice the three Cs in low-stakes situations first + 7 more

Accountability Partners · Crucial Accountability: Holding People to Commitments That Matter · Aim for reintegration, not permanent labeling + 7 more

Psychological Hardiness, Made Practical · Build perceived control by focusing on your sphere of influence · Reappraise obstacles as growth opportunities rather than pure threats + 7 more

Social Comparison Online: What the Research Actually Shows · Practice deliberate curation awareness — remind yourself of what you are not seeing · Redirect comparison from others to your own past self + 7 more

Psychological Hardiness, Made Practical · Practice the three Cs in low-stakes situations first · Build perceived control by focusing on your sphere of influence + 7 more

Extend kindness toward strangers, not just your inner circle · Widening the circle of care · The concentric-circle extension of ren + 7 more

Psychological Safety in Teams · Develop challenger safety — dissent and challenge are welcomed, not punished · Respond immediately and visibly to safety violations + 7 more

Crucial Accountability: Holding People to Commitments That Matter · Notice and question the story you’ve already told yourself · Build a concrete accountability agreement + 7 more

Identify compatible interests for joint gain · Interests vs. Positions: The Core of Integrative Negotiation · Ask "why" before proposing any solution + 7 more

Psychological Safety in Teams · Psychological Safety, Made Practical · Respond immediately and visibly to safety violations + 7 more

Know and mark the edges of your circle · Circle of Competence · Be transparent about your competence limits + 7 more

Rank your top values · Use the bullseye to resolve competing values · Resolving a decision with two competing values + 7 more

Rank your top values · Resolving a decision with two competing values · Competing (assertive, uncooperative) + 7 more

Radical Acceptance, Made Practical · Distinguish acceptance from approval · Willing hands and half-smile (acceptance through the body) + 7 more

Think of discipline as a practice that compounds · Use discipline to build the right habit · Reduce the demand on willpower through environment design + 7 more

Radical Acceptance, Made Practical · Distinguish acceptance from approval · Accept first, then act on what can change + 7 more

Make the step-down visibly deliberate · Receive every suggestion with only "thank you" · Apply reciprocity in feedback conversations + 7 more

Radical Acceptance, Made Practical · Willing hands and half-smile (acceptance through the body) · Radical acceptance in a crisis + 7 more

Surface utility value by connecting a task to goals you already care about · Using your ranked values as a coaching north star · Values-Based Action (ACT), Made Practical + 7 more

Radical Candor, Made Practical · Care personally · Place feedback on the 2x2 + 7 more

Using your ranked values as a coaching north star · Anchor each goal to a named, personal value · Excavate core values before writing goals + 7 more

Radical Candor, Made Practical · Care personally · Place feedback on the 2x2 + 7 more

Create something that expresses your unique presence · Maintain meaning sources proactively, not only after crisis · Receive meaning through beauty, love, and nature + 7 more

Recognition-Primed Decision Making · Override recognition and deliberate when the situation is genuinely novel · Articulate the cues that triggered your recognition + 7 more

Recognition-Primed Decision Making · Override recognition and deliberate when the situation is genuinely novel · Affirm a core value before a high-stakes decision + 7 more

Apply the experiential processes early, behavioral ones later · Install feedback loops to track behavior and adjust · Use relaxation as a foundation for habit awareness + 7 more

Recognition-Primed Decision Making · Override recognition and deliberate when the situation is genuinely novel · Select the specific coping skills you will use — in advance + 7 more

Feedback Loops and Behavior Change · Give feedback in the moment, not stockpiled for reviews · Choose the right moment and setting for feedback + 7 more

Let go of perfectionism · Tolerating and valuing incompleteness · Practice deliberate acceptance of human fallibility + 7 more

Reference Class Forecasting · Conduct post-project debriefs to contribute to the class data · Identify the right reference class for your situation + 7 more

Build a culture of discipline, not a disciplinarian culture · Build systems that run without motivation · Think of discipline as a practice that compounds + 7 more

Reference Class Forecasting · Conduct post-project debriefs to contribute to the class data · Identify the right reference class for your situation + 7 more

Use graduated social exposure · Become a regular somewhere · Design your daily environment to create repeated exposure + 7 more

Reference Class Forecasting · Conduct post-project debriefs to contribute to the class data · Update your forecast incrementally as new evidence arrives + 7 more

Distinguish adaptive from complicated continuing bonds · Use symbolic objects as tangible continuing bonds · Use physical touch to reinforce emotional safety + 7 more

Surface and test underlying assumptions · Set the constraint: what conclusions would you not accept? · Explore the implications and consequences of a position + 7 more

Relationship Maintenance Behaviors · Pro-relationship maintenance behaviors · Anchor the wind-down with a consistent starting cue + 7 more

Establish shared purpose before delivering critique · Invite a response after delivering SBI · Feedback: extract the signal, ignore the noise + 7 more

Relationship Maintenance Behaviors · Pro-relationship maintenance behaviors · Update your love map after major life changes + 7 more

Contemplative Prayer: The Inner Journey · Contemplatio: resting in wordless presence · Contemplation opening to universal compassion + 7 more

Shift from one-person to two-person psychology · Relationship Maintenance Behaviors · Pro-relationship maintenance behaviors + 7 more

Bridge disagreements with contingent terms · Write contingent contracts when forecasts disagree · Propose a post-settlement settlement to optimize an agreed deal + 7 more

Relationship Maintenance Behaviors · Invest in shared social networks · Regularly share novel and enjoyable activities + 7 more

Social Comparison Online: What the Research Actually Shows · Distinguish passive from active social media use · Prefer real conversation over low-bandwidth digital connection + 7 more

Take a structured time-out · Soften when anger says attack · Sitali (cooling breath) + 7 more

Prepare coping self-talk in advance · Graduated anger inoculation (stress inoculation exposure) · Name the primary emotion, not the secondary one + 7 more

Uncertainty Tolerance Training · Build tolerance for uncertainty through graduated exposure · Shift from negative to positive orientation toward uncertainty + 7 more

Find your personal resonance frequency rate · Resonance Frequency Breathing, Made Practical · Breathe diaphragmatically for maximum resonance effect + 7 more

Access and name the underlying attachment emotion · Connecting feelings to needs · Identify and meet the underlying unmet need + 7 more

Use resonance breathing as a pre-performance preparation · Find your personal resonance frequency rate · Resonance Frequency Breathing, Made Practical + 7 more

Make core values operational, not decorative · Values Clarification, Made Practical · Values clarification: what matters most to you? + 7 more

Use resonance breathing as a pre-performance preparation · Find your personal resonance frequency rate · Coherent breathing — 5–6 breaths per minute + 7 more

Values Clarification, Made Practical · Values clarification: what matters most to you? · Values Card Sort + 7 more

Reward Substitution · Use escalating rewards to maintain motivation across time · Watch for overjustification — external rewards can undermine intrinsic motivation + 7 more

Make core values operational, not decorative · The forced-rank sort · Rank your top values + 7 more

Use escalating rewards to maintain motivation across time · Use response cost — losing tokens for target behavior failures — with care · Reward Substitution + 7 more

The forced-rank sort · Rank your top values · Values Clarification, Made Practical + 7 more

Use escalating rewards to maintain motivation across time · Reward Substitution · Use response cost — losing tokens for target behavior failures — with care + 7 more